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Sometimes I think about leaving this site.

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Canterpiece, Aug 17, 2018.

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  1. quebec

    quebec
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    msm24681.....Ok, I just read your post and the replies to it. You're right, you're 21 and it's time to change from that caterpillar into the butterfly! BUT...you don't have to do it all at once. You text a lot...alright, in the middle of one of those text convos just slip in that you been thinking a lot lately and you're unsure of your sexuality. That's a really low key way of starting it out. You could even ask for advice as she has made her sexuality clear. Don't think about it too much or you will chicken out agin...JUST.DO.IT! It took me a hour to tell my first that I was gay...I know what the fear and terror feel like...but the relief after is one of the best moments of my life...yours will be too! :old_smile: Hey keep us updated here on empty closets...you're part of our LGBTQ Family and we do care!
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
    #21 quebec, Aug 23, 2018
  2. msm24681

    msm24681
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    Thank you so much... I really appreciate this. How would I just casually bring it up? I feel like Id need more than an hour LOL Did you get a good reaction?
     
    #22 msm24681, Aug 23, 2018
  3. msm24681

    msm24681
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    I really should just go for it and risk it all but like I don't want to ruin our friendship. I see so much going for us! Like honestly, friend-wise, I swear...
    Things have gotten me thinking like I hate losing people. Maybe thats why Im so scared. I had a budding friendship with someone in high school. They were already sick with cancer for almost 6 months at the time. I never really spoken to this person until we were put in the same section. Despite the fact they were sick, this person still went to school and I was lucky enough to have gotten to know them with all of our similar extracurricular activities. I honestly got really lucky. I love meeting friends and letting people into my life. This person told me their aspirations and I also shared mine. It was really cool. I wouldn't have called us best friends but definitely really good friends. Well, 13 months later, after a 2 year battle, this person passed away. And it hit harder than I thought. Im not a cryer but next thing I knew, my younger brought up their passing and I started bawling at the kitchen table. My family was so confused bc they didn't even know we were friends. I guess after that I swore Id never take a friend for granted. Which is why Im so loyal today. Like the shit I do for my friends in beyond me but hey here I am and they know it. TG like if they don't notice the shit I do Id probs lose it haha But anyways, back to the main topic, theres still that part of me that regrets not doing more. SO, here I am, potentially risking a friendship. You may say, well if your friendship with her means that much then what are you doing. ASKING MYSELF THE SAME THING. As you can probs tell, I can barely control how I feel about her. I know, this is different, but I just hate losing a friend. The thought is terrible. And even more, losing her? Like Id say to myself, "Shit what have you done."
     
    #23 msm24681, Aug 23, 2018
  4. quebec

    quebec
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    msm24681.....If you take a very low-key approach, I don't think that you will risk losing her as a friend. After all, she is your friend and has been open about her sexuality. Why would she be upset if her friend (you) asked her advice on a subject that she has been open about? If you don't say anything about your attraction to her and just ask for some advice/help with a problem...isn't that what friends do? Yes, if you just drop a bomb on her it could be difficult, but this way you will have time to gage her reaction and so understand better how to continue. You've really waited long enough...don't let this opportunity go by...just taken one very small step and then go from there...
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:

    PS. DO IT!!!
     
    #24 quebec, Aug 23, 2018
  5. msm24681

    msm24681
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    Ok ok you're right. That sounds simple enough like its not like I AM telling her that I like her. Ok Ill def do this tomorrow. Ill keep you updated...
     
    #25 msm24681, Aug 23, 2018
  6. fadedstar

    fadedstar Guest

    I'm going to leave soon. Although it probably comes from a well meaning place, a lot of the help offered here is a collection of feel good platitudes. When I joined I was hoping more for practical and applicable advice based on lived experience. Having been alone the vast majority of my life I don't feel like I can offer anyone else anything useful since I don't have nearly enough experience myself when it comes to relationships and intimacy.
     
    #26 fadedstar, Aug 25, 2018
    Last edited by a moderator: Aug 25, 2018
  7. quebec

    quebec
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    fadedstar.....So sorry that you feel that way. I don't consider the help that I got in response to my first post here as a platitude or trivial...it prevented me from taking my own life. It started me on the path to finding and finally understanding who I really am. That was a very real Gift of Life to me. I know others who have been in what so very many here have called a "trap". They have felt that no matter what they did, where they turned...there was no hope. I have seen those same people find the help that they so desperately needed here on empty closets. Of course not every post is that desperate. However, I hold out hope that by being able to encourage and help our LGBTQ Family we can show them how to avoid those desperate situations that many of us have faced. Some of us here on EC are still working through difficult times and need support. Others are in a position to offer that support...that is what a family does. We are here for you at any time. We will always do our best to be encouraging and to help in any way that we can. If this website isn't what you need, than I do hope that you can find help somewhere else.
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
    #27 quebec, Aug 25, 2018
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