I am very new at the dating same sex. I recently told my crush that I liked her. So we are planning on going on a date this weekend. But now that I think about it. I still have never been on a date. So I know that guy would more and likely pay. But when it comes to paying with the same sex couple. Who pays? Also this is actually just a hang out and were only saying its a date bc I haven't told that many people yet.
who pays? well, obviously, no one, because it’s a man’s job to pay.... it’s the perfect loophole! the greatest benefit of dating girls! jokes aside, here’s the great thing about same sex dating: there are no rules. most dating etiquette is based on very outdated gender stereotypes (a man should pay because he’s the one making the money, etc) and even on a straight date i would argue these do not need to apply at all, but on a date like yours they definitely don’t need to because there is no man so no traditional gender division! how to go about this is partially culturally dependent (where i live you split the bill by default and it’d actually be weird to offer to pay someone’s bill even on a date, unless you owe that person something) but generally i believe the attitude is that whoever initiated the date pays. really though, there are no rules and you can shape your date however you wish, just completely ignore “rules” that movies and books and whatnot make you believe exist in dating. there’s no “right” or “wrong” way to date. what matters is that you have a good time with your date, not whether it’s in any way meeting up to social standards
You can always say "You can pay next time." That little phrase has lots of good points, which I am sure you can see too. That would be if both of you are really treating it as a date. If you want to make it more hang-out-y, then splitting the bill helps there. Anyway, can I just say congrats for you telling her you like her and making a plan to spend time together. Every day is just practice for the next day.
I agree with what the others here have said. Especially early on, I’d think that whoever asks pays (if it’s a date). Then people would perhaps take turns asking and paying so that it isn’t just one person all the time. Or if it’s just a hang out or if you both planned it, then you can split the bill. I’d probably plan to split the bill. From what I’ve heard, I think it’s becoming more common for people to use this method rather than the traditional “the man pays for the date,” regardless of what relationship they’re in. But maybe that’s just where I live. Anyway, I hope that your date goes well, and have fun!
I kind of think that whoever asked the other person on a date should at least offer to pay. If your date refuses to let you pay for everything, you can work something out like splitting the bill evenly or pay for what you individually purchased/ordered/whatever
The guy paying is old fashioned although some girls probably like it lol. But this is always tricky if you haven't figured it out before. 1. Who asked for the date pays 2. Offer to Split it 50/50 or your share If she gets the bill I would offer to split or pay my share. She might appreciate it but pay it anyways
On our first date my bf got out his credit card to pay for our dinner before I could get mine out. But then we went to a bar for a couple beers afterwards and I paid for that.
Talk about it! It can be awkward, but it will take the whole anxiety about it "This is new to me. How should we handle payment? Maybe we can split it? What do you prefer?" I personally prefer for everyone to always pay for themselves. Even with my husband we always pay for ourselves and my family always finds it the weirdest thing, but it works for us. You get to make your own rules
Usually when I go on a date with a woman, we go with the optic to pay for our share but I often end up picking up the bill if I have a good time or the first round and they pay the second one. There is no rule and if you split the bills it generally never causes resentment, unlike in straight dates (I have noticed). So do whatever feels more comfortable/adequate at the time.
