What are you thinking?

Job interview today, kinda confident I'll get the job, but still extremely nervous!

 

Good luck!

 

My mother JUST told me that apparently I'm overwhelming her with the LGBT, which she's not really interested in.
Understandable, due to my times having to bring up to her that LGBT isn't just for lesbians, gays, bis, and trans...(s...?) and (what brought her to say that) my telling her that Mississippi is forbidding same-sex marriage.
She says she accepts me for me, but is still overwhelmed about LGBT. I think the other parts of what are overwhelming her right now are the troubles with her landlord and her hesitancy of going to her specialist so... idk.
Also, earlier today, my mother told me I was bragging about my sexuality, which I told her would pass (due to me reading a thing about it). To be fair, I was kinda bragging about it, not to many people, though especially to myself. That was brought on after I told her what I wanted to say to her and her friend last night (which was "I'm part of the rainbow now!")
So idk...

 

Yesterday was a good Election Day. I’m still sore from working the tabulator at my precinct for 14 hours, but all of my candidates won.

 

So now my mom says that "If I'm willing to have sexual experiences with the same sex then I'm gay", and says she doesn't believe there is "bi", or "heteroflexible", or any of that shit.
Despite her saying she accepted me for me, she also said that to me today. So...

 

A few days back, people at work were randomly chatting and I got asked how long my longest relationship was. I literally just gave the number of months, but today a guy asked "how old is your partner?". I hate that word (less they are nb of course), to me it screams "I'm too awkward to say boyfriend" or the slightly better option of using it instead of saying "boyfriend or girlfriend".

So now I'm thinking they must know or saw my phone or something.

 

I hate that after washing a shirt twice and targeting the stain directly, I can STILL see a faint mustard stain on the front. Of course it had to be on a shirt I've only worn for the first time as well.

 

That it's a strange feeling to feel unwelcome..and I'm both happy I took the chance to make myself happy, and not wanting to be there ever again..

 

I hate it when people call their boyfriend or their girlfriend their partner. Like you don’t work together can you use a better term?

 

Sorry to hear about your cat. Twenty years is a long life though and I'm sure she was much loved. Will you get another cat?

 

I used to say partner, before we got married. We'd been together for such a long time that we seemed to have passed the boyfriend stage, and in fairness, neither of us were boys anymore. Felt weird to me to say boyfriend. Also, before same sex marriage was legalised in the UK, you could have a legally recognised civil partnership and I think that lent more weight to the term partner, rather than boyfriend or girlfriend.

Just saying!

 

it's raining, finally *-*

 

She was very loved. We want to get another one eventually, but for now we're not thinking about that.

 

Thinking it's about that time to come out at work and to my mom's side. Ugh, sucks that coming out will always be a continuous process

 

I don't know why I'm here anymore. Everyone has been so kind and so many people have given me great advice, but then I can never follow through on it and go back to my old ways of thinking and harmful habits anyway, so it just feels like I'm wasting people's time and being a negative influence by complaining but never fixing stuff.

 

Nah man you are a welcome addition to the regulars here.

Everyone presents a version of themselves that they want others to see but we rarely live up to that persona in real life.
I’ve given so much advice that I should take for myself.

It takes a certain mindset to break old habits, I’ve had success with some things and other habits have been more difficult but I know that if you put your mind to it you can change whatever it is you need to change.

 

Thanks. haha. Interview got moved to tomorrow, so the anxiety of the interview has been prolonged.

 

Why the hell is Trump making a space force??? We have no enemies in space (no one has enemies in space, there's no one there), so why do we need military presence there???

 

In his entire presidency, has he made a decision that made sense ones?