Most people would call it “friends with benefits”, but we’ve only gone (and probably will go) as far as making out. We both like each other, but she told me recently that she just wants to be best friends so she can love me longer, which is understandable - we’re very close. Naturally I asked if she was still okay with cuddling and me playing with her hair, which she enjoys and is fine with. Today I texted her, saying that I have to be honest and that I miss kissing her. She agreed and said it was nice, so I said that I assumed that wouldn’t happen anymore. She said that would be like “friends with benefits”, then proceeding to ask, wouldn’t I feel weird kissing her even though she doesn’t want to date? I said yes, and then asked if it was okay. She said “I think so, unless I change my mind.” We’re very close, open and honest with each other. Is a friendship like this normal, and has anyone else been in one?
I'm not sure if a friendship like this is 'normal' nor have I ever been in one. However, it's one of those things that if everything is clear between you two and nothing tension-wise breaks this, I don't see anything wrong with it.
I was thinking that as well. My only problem is that I'm a very protective and jealous person, so if she starts dating someone, I don't know what I'd do.
I think life is too short to worry about what sort of relationship is "normal". You've found someone to be physically intimate with, enjoy it while you can. Whatever happens, happens. Some people might not think much of your situation, that you're ruining a friendship or messing with each others feelings or whatever. Who cares, it's your business. Many friendships become closer and drift apart for different reasons. I've spent the last three years of my life obsessing over a guy who was just not into me. He didn't want to be my romantic partner, he didn't want to be my fuckbuddy, he didn't even want to be just a mate and have a drink with me. And I'm still heartbroken even though nothing happened between us. So I envy you. You've got more than I had with the guy I liked.
Very true. Life is short and I should value it. I always forget that we only have one life. I'm so hesitent with everything, I need to do more, and worry less. I'm sorry about that guy man. It really hurts when you 100% know they have no interest in you.
hurts even more when you realise you've wasted nearly three years of your life trying to convince yourself that you can get through to someone and be a special part in their life. Even if he had used me for a one night stand and dumped me I would have been happier. At least all of the longing and curiosity would have lead to something instead of just nothing.
