I think I’m transgender but I can’t imagine being a man in the future. I can’t imagine being a woman either. My parents raised my very femininely if that makes sense and although I’m not that feminine now and haven’t been for years it’s sort of all I’ve known. I think by coming out I’m stepping into the unknown and i might then realise I’m not trans. That is unlikely but still a possibility. I don’t know if I’m overthinking everything. I’m just really confused about everything. It’s all I think about and I just want to be sure.
Elliott489.....Hello and a very big welcome to empty closets! There is a forum here on EC that might help you out. Look for the "Gender Identity and Expression" forum and post there. I think you'll hear from people who have been through the same kind of things that you are facing! I'm so glad that you have found us! .....David
Hey there Elliot! Before I came out, and even for a while after I came out, I experienced more or less the same level of doubt you are experiencing now. There's a sign that hangs in my room that reads: better an oops than a what if. I didn't put it there, but I never took it down. Maybe you do turn out to be wrong, but what if you aren't? What if you could live your intended, happy life as a man? What if you never take the chance? "What if"s always signify regret to me. "Oops"s are mistakes; they can't be helped, but you can learn from them. Ultimately your goal is to achieve happiness. Imagine you are on the edge of a large field onto which you step out. Perhaps you start walking and realize you are heading in the wrong direction. That's okay, no big deal, you just turn and go a different way, maybe it's even the right way. But you may never know what the right way is unless you step onto that field. Don't be afraid of taking the first step. Usually first steps can be undone.
If you can't see yourself as a man or a woman, I recommend that you look into some nonbinary genders to see if there are any labels that you feel connected to!
Experiment experiment experiment. Try new hairstyles, wear different clothes, test out a name and some pronouns, try accessories! Research different labels and see how they feel. Just, well, experiment. That's really all you can do. So have fun with it; fear is useless and temporary so do you and be kind to one another... that includes you
