I've been on and off this site for years now and have always struggled with coming to term with who I am. A few months ago I came out to someone that I'd only know for about four years but knew really well. I'd thought about coming out previously but could never get round to saying it. I think the main reason I did come out was because I was so depressed and fed up that I just didn't care anymore. She was surpirsed to hear I'm gay but wasn't bothered in the slightest and I was expecting a bigger reaction or a hug afterwards but it was just like a normal conversation as if we were talking about the weather. My concern now is that nothing has really changed, this may be because I'm depressed but I thought I'd feel a little better or relieved. It's not a few months on and nothing has changed and I still feel just as bad. I'm asexual so finding a relationship has proven harder than I expected and I'm really at a loss as to what to do next.
The fear of what everyone else will think about us "if they only knew" really is all in our own heads. After coming out myself, life did go on pretty much as it had before - meaning that the people in my life (friends, family, co-workers) didn't treat me any differently. Perhaps that can be a bit of a letdown because I had built it up in my own head for so long. For me, the main relief I obtained was from no longer hiding my secret. I would suggest working on how you feel about yourself more than your worries of what other people think. Good luck!!
Thanks, I think I was hoping they'd have the same sense of relief as i was expecting but I guess this is real life and not a movie. I've not been worrying a out what other people think and it was more for myself than them. As you say, I need to start working on myself first but that's easier said than done.
