just curious if anyone has done this with their significant other. me and mine would like to start this some time next year. any info,advice, ect?
I haven't done it personally, my aunt has. I think you first need to discuss the basis and how you want to go about it like who will be carying? Do you want an anonymous donor or the donor to be someone that you know? And if it's someone that you know do you want him to be an active part of the kid's life? Once that is decided you need to decide if you want to self-insiminate (at your home) or if you want to it medically following the procedure. If so, I suggest you have a look around for good fertility clinics. I think in the US you can put the name of two women on the birth's certificate so you will both officially and by law be the baby's mum right? you can't do that in my country so if that's also not the case in the US that's also something to discuss because if things go sour between you two you do not want to use the baby has a weapon of have the baby used against you so those are the things no one likes to talk about but must be decided and talked about and lawfully enforced before a baby comes around. Pretty much it's a LOT of talking but the rest of the procedure is pretty straight forward once you have decided on how to proceed.
Actually just had a look at your profile and fully remember your story. So I definitely urge you to make sure that all is legally in place so that both your parental rights are protected so that you don't go through and unfortunate remake of your past relationship if things go sour between you two.
so glad I didn't have to tell the story again lol yeah if you're married you can both go on the birth certificate and that'll be something that will happen before the process begins. I did quite a bit of research, I can use my egg but it'll cost a lot more. I never wanted to be pregnant so there's no dilemma there other than the fact I would love to use my egg. I'd pick an anonymous donor, my past experience won't let me do otherwise. Found a clinic here in Orlando - Dr. Brown, really good reviews. wouldn't really mind doing the self-inseminate, I'm just everywhere. definitely have time but early info is never bad. what did your aunt do?
Obviously if you want to use your eggs and her to carry, clinic is the way to go. It will be more expensive etc, BUT legally I think it backs your case a bit more and she can't just turn around and say the baby is from a one night stand and not actually yours etc... A) because the baby will be genetically yours and B) because you will have gone through a fertility clinic who will back you up. Also you can't really do a random sperm donation when self-insimating because you have to meet the donor, make sure he is clean, talk to him etc... which opens the gates to him suddenly changing his mind and wanting to be part of the life of his kid. Personally, in your case, I would go with a fertility clinic. My aunt went through a fertility clinic, followed the treatment and used her own eggs and her partner's sperm, it took 3 rounds and a miscarriage but she now has an almost 2 yo.
I've been through IUI and IVF (in a hetero marriage). It didn't work for me and was heartbreaking, but it works out for lots of people, and you probably have an advantage if neither of you are dealing with infertility. My eggs weren't good quality. Several women I know did IVF in the Czech Republic because it's less expensive than the U.S., so if finances are an issue you might want to check into it (Google Zlin IVF). IUIs are fairly easy. IVF is tons of shots, lots of doctor visits for scans, and the egg retrieval process requires anesthesia. If you have any specific questions about IVF, I'm happy to answer.
