I know I want to come out publicly but I’m afraid to, because I know that to most people I’ve never showed signs or ‘symptoms’ of trans. I know for sure that I am trans, but to others including my parents I’ve always acted like a typical boy in public. I look and sound like a boy and I’ve more or less acted like one for the majority of my life. I’ve tried growing my hair and nails but my parents always force my to have them cut (I’m 16 so I don’t know if they’re legally allowed to do that, but they never let my hair grow more than 4 inches on top). I’m just wondering if there are any good ways of hinting to my friends and family that I might be trans. At the moment I’m kinda stuck on what to do and I want things to change.
In my opinion, the best way is just to start being more and more you in whichever ways you can. As far as I know, there aren't any laws that specifically address parental control over their teens' grooming, but at 16, most everyone would agree that you should have the final say over how you wear your hair and nails. And even without growing them out, you can feminize them through hair products and nail polish (a clear gloss helps without drawing too much attention!) or buy a nice wig. You can also try more feminine clothing and/or activities if those appeal to you. Bringing up other trans women in conversation is a good way to broach the subject without it directly being about you - famous people like Caitlyn Jenner or Jazz Jennings, books/films/TV shows about trans people (FX's show "Pose" is AMAZING btw), etc.
It really is a great idea to take it one step at a time when you want to appear female in public. I also started with painting my nails, then moved up to traditionally feminine clothing, but I started with things that aren't that in-your-face-obvious. I found that hot pants (maybe with a pair of leggings underneath) and a t-shirt are great for starters (Fyi, they're also amazing to wear while riding a bike. You have nothing restricting your movement and the wind and sunshine on your legs feel great). Then I moved on to more feminine tops and dresses, eventually. Recently I've also started using tons of shiny, colorful eye make up and lipsticks. I also found it to be a good idea to pick and choose the places where you appear female. I began with riding my bike out of the city in feminine clothing, then I moved on to taking walks in the city, and now I always wear whatever I want to wear, no matter where I go. The only exception is work. I only started wearing nail polish to work recently (Tomorrow I'll wear some make up as well), and we're required to wear long pants and a company shirt. But it really depends on the company and the people you work with. At my other job, I knew that my bosses and my colleagues are all awesome people, so it was much easier to show up wearing heavy make up and nail polish.
Maybe you can try hanging out with girls and doing feminine things like being interested in fashion and cooking. Or whatever you like, really.
