All my life I have wanted to appear masculine sometimes and have certain masculine features. When I was I was 12 I thought I was trans for a really quick sec but realized I don't want to fully identify as male. Then I started to identify as genderfluid, but it was more of a personal thing and never came out about it. I later decided the label wasn't for me and I could live without a label and just be okay with identifying as female. Recently, I have found that I am nit picking my appearance more because they are too feminine. It is small things like my hands, my neck, my face, and my hip shape. I want these specific masculine features because I have seem girls with them and they looked masculine and feminine. I had described this to my friend once and she said, "so...you're androgynous" and I just froze and was like "is that what that is??" I didn't really know androgynous was a gender but a look or style, but then again it is gender expression so it makes sense. I just always correlated androgynous with fashion. Anyway, I am wondering, am I androgynous? Do i have to look androgynous to identify as so? How to I go about this? Does pronouns matter?
Typically the word androgynous does describe one’s appearance or style, or something that has traits of both masculinity and femininity, however the gender identity term to basically describe the exact same experience, just as an identity, is androgyne! An androgyne is anyone who just feels their internal gender identity is composed of both feminine and masculine traits. They don’t have to be in equal measure, and you don’t have to want to appear / dress androgynously all the time to feel the way you’re describing. But if being androgyne / androgynous is just how you feel best expresses / describes what you experience, then it’s for you! Also, you can use whatever pronouns you like and still identify as androgyne. He/she/they, whatever is most comfortable for you. Androgyne is just one example of a non-binary identity. There are binary trans identities (trans male/masculine, and trans female/feminine) and non-binary trans identities (agender, androgyne, genderfluid, demiboy/girl, bigender, etc.) For example, I identify as both agender and transmasculine, meaning internally I don’t feel like I’m a man or a woman, but I like to express myself in a masculine way and would like others to perceive me in a more masculine way.... but sometimes this makes me appear androgynous too even though I don’t identify as androgyne, and I like looking androgynous as well. I am also most comfortable with they/them and he/him pronouns, but when I first came out to myself a few years ago, I still used she/her pronouns! It’s really just all about whatever makes you the most comfortable.
