So. I feel like i may be ossessing over nothing but i need advice and someone who can sort my head out. My best friend's brother is gay and known to be a huge player. Its common knowledge that he's into me but he is also fully aware that I'm straight. During a drunken evening for his sister's birthday, he confessed that his feelings for me are 'overwhelming'. He said that the reason he can't settle with anyone is because nobody compares to me. I dont know if it was due to the fact he can flirt his way into anyones pants or what but holy hell. The rush i got after his little speech really got to me. I dont know if this is gonna wear off but right now i cant concentrate on anything and im so in a pickle. Im still not attracted to men, but the way my body is now reacting when i speak to him, well you can only imagine.... HELP
I think it can be thrilling for anyone to have someone, especially someone who is generally desirable (even if you don't desire them yourself), that attracted to you. I've had quite a few straight guys get positively butthurt at the notion that I wasn't attracted to them. There's nothing wrong with basking in it a bit--but it also doesn't mean there's necessarily anything else going on. The other caveat I would put out there is a player's gonna play, especially when presented with a "challenge". As someone who was once upon a time a bit of player and also someone who has never shied away from a challenge, I have to say to me it sounds like a line--a good one, but a line nonetheless.
Thanks for the reply. I honest to god feel ridiculous doing this. But thank you. Yeah, I totally get that. Like I said, he's a huge player. He's a good guy, but he just likes "the chase" of getting the guy and then loses interests. He usually gets what he wants, so maybe he only wants me more because I'm off limits. Im rambling. But I can't help feeling that maybe im being too close minded and denying the fact he's got me more riled up than any woman has in a long time. I couldnt really tell you the last time I felt this out of sorts. I dont know if im just a bit flattered like you said. Or, maybe, am I genuinely attracted to him?? This is so weird. Argh.
You may be really attracted to him. He sounds great. I think you should experiment a bit. Let him know that you are flattered and not yet ready to encourage him. This might start a conversation that will help you resolve your dilemma.
Have you thought about him (or other guys) while masturbating? If you use porn, presuming it's straight porn, do you look at the guys more than the girls? Do you notice guys' bodies when you're out wandering around? These can all be indicators that you're not totally straight. It also sounds like there's some intrigue and excitement about the idea of trying something with him. If you're open to experimenting, there's nothing wrong with that. The caveat I'd give is... if the guy is a player, you may be a conquest; for whatever reason, some gay guys put a huge premium on "turning" straight guys, and he may see this as a contest rather than something genuine. What he said could easily be seen as manipulation to get what he wants. But... even if that's the case, if you want to experiment and see what it's like, there's no harm in doing so, just be prepared that his real motivation may not be for more than a one-night thing, and that could make you feel used or shitty afterwards. But it will still help you understand if you enjoy the experience of being with guys.
