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Never been kissed

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Claysun, Jun 17, 2018.

  1. Claysun

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    I am a celibate gay man who is still in the closet. I have never been on a date with a man or a woman. When i discovered that I was gay at age 15 I deciced that I didn't need sex or a relationship to be happy, that there was more to life. Now I am in my 50s and think otherwise. I don't know how to begin this adventure but I don't want to wait much longer to try. There are two gay men who moved in across the street from me two years ago and I want to ask them for advise but haven't built up the courage to do so. I don't know how to start this conversation with them. One of them is my age the other younger. Any advise?
     
  2. WilliamHunter

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    Dear friend, my life was a little similar, but i was married while I was gay. I started exploring on the various web sites, applications and forums. There I found true face-to-face friends that has become very supportive. Give it a try. You're not the only newbie online. Peace!
     
  3. Claysun

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    Thank You
     
  4. Nickw

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    Clayson

    This is the perfect time of year to get out there a bit as it is "Pride" season. Most towns have festivals in the month of June and it is an opportunity to dip your toes into the LGBQT community. This might be a way to start a conversation with your neighbors. You could just ask if they are attending Pride as you would like to check it out. Many straight folks go to Pride. My whole family goes actually to offer support to family members. So, this doesn't have to be a coming out exercise.

    If they are receptive and you are comfortable, I found most gay men were very accepting and accommodating when I came out as bisexual a couple years ago. I was not ready for intimacy, as I am married. But, I really needed to talk to other LBBQT men. I used one of the hookup apps and my add was to meet as "just friends". I don't know if it is a good idea in your area. But, in mine I, immediately, was invited to a number of parties and functions and met some great guys.

    There are also other groups in a lot of areas. In mine, there is a gay hiking group and a gay skiing group. "Meetup" is a site that has all sorts of group activities. Even a stop at the local LGBQT center in your area could give you some ideas. You will find folks at those centers to be, usually, pretty cool.

    EVERY gay or bi man goes through this. Some of us are older. I think you will find an accepting community. Good luck.
     
  5. Claysun

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    thank you
     
  6. smurf

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    Have you introduced yourself to them before?

    If you haven't then start by doing just that and invite them over to dinner. See if you even like them as people before you take advice from them. Once you feel comfortable doing so share your story with them and ask them for advice. Most LGBT people are fairly good at helping one another in the coming out process.
     
    Love4Ever and Drizzle like this.
  7. Claysun

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    Yes, we have met and I have had various non personal conversations with them.
     
  8. Love4Ever

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    I agree. Definitely try to get to know them. You could have a small dinner party, BBQ etc.