Does anyone use both male and female pronouns

I know a guy who does. He is a guy but he looks naturally androgynous and also wears feminine clothing. He says he "just doesn't care."

 

I'm bi-gender, and I use both pronouns. I'm afab, and "she" is never dysphoric, I like to hear "he" while in guy swing, and I hate "he" when I'm on a girl swing. "They" is always dysphoric, because my genders are both very binary, and I feel "they" invalidates both my genders, sticking me in a dysphoric androgynous middle.

 

I don't encourage it or insist on it but it wouldn't bother me if people used either pronoun to refer to me, just as long as I knew they were referring to me, I don't really see language as anything more than a tool and have a pretty indifferent attitude towards it all.

 

Having said that if I could sense a malicious intent behind the usage of a pronoun I wouldn't be okay with it. So for me it's the meta-communication or intent behind what is being said that really matters.

 

Not publicly, but I do sometimes called myself "Lauren" in private.

 

I am starting to think that my pronouns may be situational. That is, my work persona is male based. I developed how I work and interact with others in a professional environment based on pretending to be a boy... so "He" feels comfortable and not even dysphoric there.

With my friends, I reeeeeally like they/them. I feel a closer bond with people who know and actively use "they/them" pronouns for me. I very much appreciate it because not everyone is comfortable with it.

but, in trans* events and some parts of online I prefer "she/her". Mainly because I don't really get it anywhere else but I do like fem pronouns too.

I have not come out at work yet... when I do come out, I may find that asking those who work closest with me to use they/them works but I am not sure. For now it doesn't bug me if they use "he"... so I'll have to see.

 

One of my friends uses he/she/they and another friend uses he and she but not they. So yeah there’s people out there and at the end of day you should use whatever makes you most comfortable

 

Yes I technically do. They is fine with me, although I prefer he and she.
I am so androgynous that I get called both he and she IRL without asking for it.
Mostly, I get called a dude and a he in contexts where I "count" as "one of the guys".
But I am a girl, so? I get called she, and that's alright.
I guess I'm just very "whatever" about pronouns.

 

For about 2-3 years I didn’t like how they/them felt on me so I typically either let it slide and went by my perceived gender (she/her) or told people to use he/him. Nowadays I guess if I could care less and don’t have the time / energy to explain, I just let people assume I’m a girl and use she/her, but now I prefer they/them because it’s just the easiest and gives me the least dysphoria and all of my close friends use they/them for me.... but sometimes I think it’s fun when people use he/him as well, my girlfriend does this sometimes as she’s the only one whose really cool w/ that kinda thing. So they/them or he/him are fine for me, but honestly if you’re nonbinary or bigender or whatever and you just happen to prefer only binary pronouns that’s totally fine!!

 

I've met a fair number of people who say you can use any pronoun for them, but it seems that most of them usually get called by the pronoun associated with the gender they are typically perceived as.

 

I go by 'them' because it's easier for most people, and because 'she' can cause dysphoria in the wrong moments. Ideally people would be able to tell what gender I am at any moment without me telling them or correcting them, but I can change genders over a period of 3-6 hours, so it's just not viable for the average person to pick up on that when I can't pass currently and can't shape shift my face or clothes to project those signals.
It also means people can't default to 'she' if I leave it open-ended.