Ok so long story short I'm a trans boy. I'm out to everyone I know and I introduce myself with the name I've chosen. Some people are being dicks, that's obvious, but what really fucking hurts me is that my parents don't accept me. My dad acts like I never even told him and my mom does try a bit but she's completely against me taking T or introducing me to people as Ethan. I secretly bought 2 binders but we ended up that since I paid for them it's my right to keep them (my dad stole one of them as well but we figured it out.). Now I understand it's not easy for my mom (cause honestly I've given up on my dad) but it's been 1 year since I told them and about 1 and a half since I told my friends (I was sure about it for 3 years now and even though I've kinda known since I was 7 I didn't know this was possible at the time and also wanted to make sure about it). I know one year is not a lot but I'm 17 right now and they're trying to convince me I'm wrong. I I just want them to understand that it really hurts me when they act like it's just something that'll pass. I feel like a stranger in my own house. Really if it was a choice I'd love to not be this way but it's not. Yeah not too short but I don't know what to do. I'd really appreciate the help.
I'm really sorry your parents aren't accepting you. I have no experience with transgender stuff so I'm not sure what that's like, but my parents took me being gay pretty badly so I know what you mean about it hurting. Even if they're against you taking testosterone - you're almost an adult anyway and can do whatever you want in a year, so things will definitely get better when you can control your own life. Hopefully your parents will see that this is just who you are and not something that'll pass. Wishing the best for you.
I don't have experience with trans* struggles, but I can share my story with you too. My parents at first didn't accept my sexuality, but finally reached a point of acceptance about a year or two ago. They sat me down and said that they just want me to be happy, no matter who I end up with. They were very sweet about it. I first came out as lesbian, in 2012, but came out again as bisexual a few years later. They seemed to be more at ease with me being bisexual, as they don't have to let go completely of the fact that I will end up with a man. It's important to remember that there are 5 stages of acceptance: Denial, anger, bargaining, depression (grief) and acceptance. It doesn't always happen in that order, and can either take days, weeks, months or years to reach the acceptance part. It can also jump back and forth between two stages. Remember, your parents feel like they've lost their daughter, when they actually gained a son. They've known you as their daughter for most of your life, so it's hard for them to now see you as a son. They're most likely still in denial, so be patient with them. Don't force the issue on them. They will learn to accept it at their own pace. Just continue showing them how loving you can be as their son and they will gradually get more used to the idea. Like Destin said, you're almost an adult, and can then get your own T and start transitioning. In the meantime, just be your awesome, loving self. It took you a few years to be sure, so don't expect your parents to accept it overnight. Take it easy on them. It's normal for them to have doubts, like you yourself have had before you finally came out. I wish you all the best, and hope that they will call you by your chosen name soon
I know you're right and I indeed have been forcing it a bit too hard on them. It just hurts a lot and even though I know that's no excuse it's seeing them barely try the gets me. They don't even want me to explain so I'm guessing they're just still in denial. It's just that there's a lot of pressure on me the past few years and them using the wrong pronouns and just acting like it doesn't exist just adds to a huge pile. I'm sorry I know I'm complaining a lot and you're right from next year it'll be a lot better. Thank you very much
