What are your thoughts on coming out over social media? I am out to everyone in my life who I felt the need to come out to in person. At this point I just feel like I’m in limbo land. My parents still act like it’s a secret even though I have expressed very clearly that it is not and they have known for three years. The other problem is that I act like it’s still a secret I need to keep because of their reaction and that it is awkward to me to come out in casual everyday life. So for these reasons I want to come out on social media to just be like “hey this is what’s up”. No more secrets. However, I’m worried that today it will look like a grasp for attention and I don’t want it to come across that way. I wanted to come out last year, but decided that I wanted to take a year to be sure and that I would post a picture from pride with a caption that makes it clear that I’m gay..but now that Pride is approaching I’m getting cold feet. Thoughts? Thanks!
Oh God. Thank you! I am looking at the same questions myself. It's like I want to do the fb post just to be able to say "this is me" but at the same time, like you said, I don't want it to feel like an attention grab. It's also tempting because everytime I've come out to someone, even though the vast majority have been positive experiences, my anxiety goes through the roof and I think one post would be like ripping the bandaid off and getting it done with. And like you with Pride coming up(my first!) I'm thinking a lot about it. If I post pics of my day what the response would be... I'm sorry I don't have any advice or answers for you but maybe knowing someone else is asking the same questions helps a little. I know it helps me.
I'm not out, but my social media profiles are full of Easter eggs that I'm bi. Almost like a dare to see who can figure it out.
I'm kind of in a reverse situation. I'm very tempted to come out on social media even if its to post a pic of myself so that friends find out. I have been sharing more stories around Trans issues so it's kind of like I'm putting it into the minds of friends on there. The problem is I'm not out to any of my family in any way and I don't know how they would react at all. I'm friends with my brother and sister in law on Facebook and an uncle so if I came out on Facebook it would soon be known by my family. That said I put a photo of myself on this site and will soon post one on my blog so I'm slowly getting more courage about being more public.
I think it can be an easy and good way to do it. I don't see it as attention hogging at all. It can be especially good if you want to be able to present who you are to your whole family. It can also save you from having to come out individually to everybody.
I felt the same before, I was worried it would be just about wanting attention but I don't think it's that, for me, it was just a way of getting that out of the way and avoiding having to come out to people in person. But also, there's no wrong reason to want to come out on social media. Personally, I had some really nice responses and who knows, you might even help someone out who's still in the closet do what feels best
You have told your parents already, so the most important people know. If you want to come out to other people on social media and you feel comfortable doing so, go for it!
When I came out on FB only the most important people knew, because I still had problems talking about it. I posted a message, something like "I'm happy to be bi", on FB on Bivisibility day. And then continued to post freely, like clicking on "goes to Belgian Pride" etc. It got the message through slowly (because not everyone seemed to get it at first) but definitely. I think it's easier because people have time to process it on their own time and often don't ask questions later on either.
i have seen a few people say they have done this, but i can’t think of any good examples to use this way... any tips on what “easter eggs” to use?
I changed my pronouns on FB ages ago and left a status update about it. One person liked it and I don't think anyone else really saw it. I think it was more for me, and I guess anyone who looks at my info
Sometimes I'll add a pride flag emoji to the end of my bio, the part where you'd need to click "more" to see it. Random Oscar Wilde quotes, my favorite being "The pure and simple truth is rarely pure and never simple." I even once included the Dewey decimal number for bisexuality in the location field of one site. Mainly to amuse myself, but who knows?
These are fun! I also found a guy's instagram once and it was filled with pictures of James Dean, and that was a nice hint I thought. (James Dean being a lesser recognized, by the straight community at least, queer male icon.) So from that I inferred that the guy was probably queer and sure enough he was! I thought that was a unique clue.
I don't know how much you do in your life to sort of "enact" you sexuality but you may be able to just start being honest and unfiltered and that could be enough. I have never come out over FB I just am out on FB. And I don't mean you could piece it together--you don't come away thinking "he might just be gay" you come away thinking "dude's gay". No announcement, no need.
