Hi everyone, Im not new here, I lost my old account from years ago. This forum was the most supportive environment I had ever gotten as an LGBT teen, and now in my 20s I come back hoping to get the same support. Im in an open relationship, one that was opened 2 years into a "traditional" relationship due to both of us being bottoms. We still cared for each other and decided to stick together through that. Personally, I have trouble accepting the change, as I have always been a one boyfriend kind of guy. So its been 2 years since, and I still havent been with anyone but my boyfriend (when that rarely happens). Today, I went to call my phone to find it, and I saw a text from a guy. In and of its self, this isnt too uncommon. Other guys text him, it never goes beyond strictly "business". The reason the text is abnormal is the timing of it, which takes some explaination. My boyfriend (we'll just call him Sean, not his real name) was hanging out with a mutual friend of ours, a straight guy and his wife. I stayed home because I was tired from working long hours at my factory job. I texted Sean at around 1am asking him to come home as I was getting lonely (I know, im pitiful). He said hed come home after they finished the movie they were watching. I said okay, and that was that. I fell asleep waiting for him/watching netflix on my couch. I wake up at 5am and hes still not home. At this point im worried for his safety, so I call a bunch of times and ask our mutual friend if Sean was still at his house. The friend said no, and just then, Sean answers the phone finally. I ask if hes okay and where hes been. He says he was going to get breakfast for us. I got a little worried mad for a short time, but I was just happy that he didnt get in a car wreck. I drop it and wait for him to come home and we cuddle to sleep. A few hours later when I wake up, I find a string of texts. Where he actually went was this guys house (we will call him Unibrow). I find Sean being cute with Unibrow and asking him if he can come over after the movie so Sean can "kiss his face and stuff". I figure out that Sean refers to me as his roomate/boyfriend when hes talking to Unibrow. Is this cheating? Do I have the right to be upset since I found out by reading a text on his phone? Sorry for the long winded post. Thanks for any answers.
Hi @SilverEye So I've never been in an open relationship but from what you say it sounds like this is part of being in an open relationship. However, it also sounds like your boyfriend is the only one getting anything out of this and, from what you say about having trouble accepting this change, that you are not particularly happy with the arrangement (just say if I'm reading too much into it). From your post it seems as though you are jealous of this other guy but given you are in an open relationship I'm not sure you can hold that against your boyfriend. On the other hand, you should be able to talk to him about it and about your relationship. So really, the only suggestion I can think of his to speak to him but be clear what it is you are unhappy about and what you would like to see done differently. Btw, how did the discussion of an open relationship come up; was it your suggestion or his?
