Reunited with my ex best friend after 7 months

I have written many threads on my ex best friend. We were really close and I had strong feelings for him. 7 months ago we had a fight over literally nothing. He said he didn’t want to be friends anymore. I met up with him 3 months ago to give him back a few of his things. We apologized to each other and he admitted it was all his fault. After that he never texted me or contacted me (more details on previous posts).

Today his sister was going to come over to my place with a friend of ours. The only thing is he was going to come along. I didn’t know it until after we made the plan. At first I was going to cancel but I decided to let him come. Seeing him was inevitable. When they got here, my heart was pounding so hard I thought I was going to pass out.

He seemed scared to talk to me and I was scared too. We kept looking at each other. I eventually broke the ice and asked how he’s been. We started talking, joking, and laughing. As time went on, it felt less awkward. He kept glancing at me and smiling. Every time I caught him doing it my heart would skip a beat. While his sister and our friend were making dinner, he turned on a video game we used to play together. After he played a few rounds I joined him.

We were acting like we have never fought. He slowly started getting closer to me on the couch. My foot touched his leg on accident. I moved it away from him. Then he laid down and moved closer to me on the couch where my legs were resting. He moved so that my legs were against his back and butt. When his sister was showing me things on her phone when the game was loading, I noticed him looking up at me and smiling.

Now this is what got to me. They had to leave and he said he wanted a few more minutes. After a few more minutes of talking to everyone, his sister and our friend said bye to me. While they were saying bye he turned around and smiled at me again. Back when we were best friends he would say bye and just leave. He would never look back at me. Today he turned around and smiled at me twice before walking out the door.

He seemed happy to see me. I was expecting a little conversation tonight but what I got was way more. I let my guard down but had a lot of fun. I always read too much into his signals but tonight I couldn’t ignore it. I can tell he really missed me. His sister commented that he hasn’t seen him laugh this much in a very long time.

When do I ask why he really stopped being friends with me? Why he hasn’t texted or called me but was telling our friends he wanted to see me? He broke my heart and I never fully got over him. I want and deserve an explanation. His sister told me that he was having a bad week when we fought but wants to be my friend again. It’s been 7 months and he just let our friendship end. How do I bring this up to him?

 

I want to fix it. I just don’t want to fall in love with him all over again. I don’t know how to be friendly without me wanting to be close to him. That night he was moving closer to me and it made me really happy. But it’s almost like he knows deep down I like him so he’s messing with me. Before when we were best friends we laid on each other, sat really close to each other, and sometimes held hands. I was not expecting on our first hangout after 7 months for him to try to lay close by me.