I am still in the closet with my family and at times I find that that can be inconvenient. There have been times in which I have my fingernails painted pink, and then am going out with my family (some of whom do not give me a lot of advanced notice which, in general, I do not like), and I would have to remove the paint which at times might still leave minor traces on my fingernails. And now this weekend, I am going on a trip with my dad, and am realizing that I would be wonderful if I could carry my purse because it can fit many of my travel books/brochures and would be wonderful for on the go. I often do, and will, wear cargo shorts which can hold those things, but the downside to that is that as I am walking, my knees are kicking the books. And then next week, I am taking my mom on a bus tour of the city, and my purse can be good for carrying bus schedules. I sometimes wish I could be out with my family but that's complicated.
Yeah I totally get you. Even this, my own phone, I have to constantly make sure that EC is not on my browser or that my netflix is logged out when I'm with my family as anyone of them could borrow my phone or even at work, with friends, they might see my history by accident while taking selfies or whatever. Life of a closeted person
Yep same! I always delete my history if I've been on this forum or another LGB social group I am a part of. I also hide all of my LGB books, tv shows I watch, etc. I hate having to do it.
Have you considered buying a rucksack, satchel or other kind of appropriate bag? It sounds like most of your problems are based around being able to carry things. Women use other bags other than purses, surely the extreme is the exception, not the rule?
Being closet is inconvenient. Fear of rejection from family, friends and society. You cant do what you want to do(gay things) or express your feelings to others. Its the hardest feeling, hiding your ownself in this world.
@Mikey D, I can definitely sympathize with you. It is a huge pain in the ass not being out. I hope it gets better soon
^ I don't have the internet activated on my phone. but the other day w/ my phone I took a photo of something I'd written LGBTQ related. and I thought of having it as a backround on my phone but. well yeah.
maybe you can come out to a family member you think you can trust the most. sometimes they get the incline that they already know about your sexuality, which has nothing to do with the way you dress, as there's nothing wrong with guys being effeminate like there's nothing wrong with girls being tomboys. but you are ready when you're ready. for me that got me out was the fact I was deeply attracted to a person of the same sex, i had to let out my feelings. but confess how you want to confess
I relate to stuff like this. I have to wipe or hide anything LGB related. Recently I had to delete a novel about lesbians off my laptop. I think it's not so much what he carries the things in, but that he WANTS to be able to use what many would consider a distinctly "feminine" bag. Naturally, you could use a more neutral looking bag, but that doesn't really solve your problem of wanting to carry something you like, since it sounds like you already have a purse you use regularly when your family is not around. Is there any way you could pass the bag off as just being your style and not an indication of your sexuality? Or could you come out and then carry it openly?
Lots of concessions if you are not fully "Out".. I know often I wear clothes that are generic if I can get away with it. But sometimes is more frustrating wearing things that don't suit you for your gender or orientation than wearing the expected clothing. One other thing that I have found that helps with the nail polish is to put clear coat first making sure to get it in the cracks around the cuticles etc. Then apply polish.. That way if you need to take it off it doesn't leave as many tattle tales.
With my dad, he would be okay with me being gay, but I don't think he would like all of the nail polish, purse, and potentially women's clothes. My mom on the other hand, would tell everybody she knows (she can be a bit of a gossip), and she might also try to give me fashion advice, which I really don't want from her.
I think you're over thinking it. if your dad doesn't like the clothes you wear that's too bad and doesn't really matter that's his opinion. and if you're mum's a gossip, tell her not to. you're parents may be your responsibility but they're not you you're an individual and so are they you have to learn how to compromise with them at some point in your life, it's a part of growing up. the clue is you're already thinking for yourself and you know what you want to do cause deep down you're comfortable with who you are.
I related to both of these so much. If I'm on my computer or phone, I always use private browsing when viewing LGBT stuff, or I use a different browser from the default one that everyone uses. When I don't use it, I clear my history and cookies.
