greetings! i'm twenty one and have only very recently acknowledged my attraction to both men and women ( i'm a female ). bisexuality has been a very different adventure for me, as all through the years of middle and high school i was the typical hetero girl. i pursued, flirted with, was romantically linked with only men. i've had an idea of my attraction to girls for a very long time, but internally i denied myself the right to be bisexual in full because for some reason i felt like i didn't deserve to be a part of the lgbt+ community. there's a lot more to the reasons of why it took me so long to acknowledge it, but since i've been out i've only revealed it to my two very best friends. they've been nothing short of supportive which has been lovely. now that i've been diving into the possibility of dating and relationships, i realize it's time to make the next step in telling my family. my parents, by no means, are homophobic. i have family members in the lgbt community and my parents have been nothing short of welcoming and supportive of them. however, being their daughter i feel extremely nervous to reveal my sexuality to them, as though maybe i've disappointed them in some way? i really, really don't think they'd be angry about it. at most i think they'll experience a bit of shock ( though something in me tells me my mom has a hunch). i'm not sure the best way to explain to them that i'm bisexual rather than a lesbian, because if anything they'll be confused about that. so here are my questions should i come out once i've started dating more actively, or do so before i dive into any of that? if my parents are confused about bisexuality as compared to being straight or lesbian, how should i explain that?
Hi, xxbwxx6! It sounds like you are ready to come out. Congratulations, that is a hard decision to make! Regarding your first question, I believe (and this is just an opinion) that you shouldn't wait until you start dating. I say this because imagine that you find someone of the same gender that you really like, you start dating them, and you want to introduce them to your parents. If this happens, your parents (even though it sounds like they would be supportive) might think you have been influenced by this person and resent them for it. Even if this doesn't happen, I believe that this conversation is something to be had when you are ready and it is something very personal. By doing so before you start dating, you'll give your parents time to let the news sink in and to ask questions. This way, they'll be better prepared to deal with the fact that you are dating a woman, if you happen to do so, and it won't feel so sudden to them. If your parents become confused, you should explain it to them as best as you can. Tell them about how you feel and show that you are available to answer any questions they might have, if not at that moment, later on when it comes to them. I don't know if you agree, but I hope this helps! Feel free to message me if you need anything. Take care and good luck!
