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Can I just say I’m gay

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by ulm, Mar 31, 2018.

  1. ulm

    ulm
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    i think/ hope I’m at the end of my questioning phase after 7 years and I’m good with the bi/ queer / gay labels, my family are really conservative and being gay is bad enough let alone bi and open to dating trans people, so my question is would it be bad to just tell them I’m gay (the umbrella term) so they know I’m in the community but not bi, so they don’t consider it a phase or say I’m confused, besides being in a straight couple seems boring to me, but I really can’t help who I crush on.
     
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  2. polecat

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    Hello ulm I wanted to start off by saying hello , I do not like to use labels myself and if you want to tell others that you are gay that is your right . There will always be those out there that will say that is a phase or your confused . If you are not ready to come out then do not rush things and who cares what others think ( in my opinion ) . When you are ready to come out it should be on your terms and not because others have pushed you or that you feel you have to do it to fit in .
    I am so glad that you are here and I hope that you will find many great friends and advice here as I know that I have . I wish you all the best and may you find the person of your dreams if you haven't already and have many many happy years together .
     
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  3. 21zephyr

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    The great thing about life is you can be whatever you want. If the gay label fits you, than use it. Whatever you decide, just be happy with yourself And don’t slow others to hate and control.
     
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  4. Mali Mali

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    I agree, use whichever label you prefer - or no label at all. If your family isn't going to be supportive no matter which label you choose, then I guess it makes sense to pick the one that makes you feel like the message is clear.

    Good luck with coming out to them :slight_smile:
     
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  5. spartafc

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    Whatever works -- some bi folks use "bi" with some and "queer" with others, as you know. If you want to use "gay" to mean "not-heterosexual," that's totally cool. :slight_smile: