Hi! So I'm like 90% sure that I'm a trans boy. I feel really uncomfortable in dresses and skirts. I hate everything that's close to skin or showing. I wear men's clothes mostly for maybe 4 years now, because I feel comfortable and good in them. I feel really upset when I look in the mirror and see all the feminine parts of my body. Only problem is that I'm scared that I won't fit among the other boys. I grew up as a female and I often act like one. Maybe not that much but I don't act like typical boys too. The other thing is that in my language everything is gendered. You can't say one sentence without pointing at yours/someones gender. I feel like it would be a little hard to change the way I've spoken for 16 years of my life. Some days I just want to tell my parents that "hey btw, I think I'm trans!" but then I think "what if it's just a phase?" I hate being in this state when I don't do anything and just like... Questioning it all the time and can't stop thinking about it. I just want to do something! What do you think?
Hi. I can relate. I feel exacly same. How long does it bother you? (8 months for me) and i'm pretty sure it isn't a phase. Maybe look up for some clues when you were child. I remember always wanting to have facial hair or go to sleep with a wish that i'll wake up as a boy next day etc. For me, those are the best signs that it isn't a phase.
Well I questioned my gender for maybe 3-4 years now but at that time I thought that "hmm I'm probably just genderfluid or something" and it like... It went away for a long time. I started thinking about it again maybe 2 months ago but way more.... intense? As a child I never thought about gender. I didn't know that you can be something other than your cis gender. I mean yeah I often dreamed about "how would it be If I wake up as a boy?". Also I always felt a little different form other girls and I tried to do something to be more like them. So that's that
I don't act completely male or female either. I wouldn't worry too much about that. Just give yourself time to figure it out. You aren't under any pressure to come to a conclusion about this.
As @SkyWinter said, try to give yourself some time to figure it out. If it's realy bothering you maybe you can tell a friend that you know will support you. Trust me, it's easier when you tell someone. And when i wrote about feelings as a kid i didn't mean about questioning or knowing something about gender. I found about word transgender 8 months ago when i started googling how i felt. As a kid i thought it's not too serious if i don't want to play with girls (i was convinced i played with boys just because i like soccer). For me, anything you can remember from your childhood would be helpful.
Anytime we have a persisting feeling that something isn't right or something is different, we should pay attention to it. If we are physically unwell and "symptoms persist" we are always advised to investigate more closely (usually by consulting a doctor) and we should use the same standard if our mind is persistently coming up with the same feelings. Ignoring everything, or dismissing it as a phase doesn't work, and in my experience doubts about gender and sexuality are very rarely a phase.
I questioned my gender for about a year and realised with the help of people close to me that it was just a phase. I'd say that if you've felt this way for a long time, especially in childhood, its more likely for it not to be a phase. Ask yourself questions like 'what do i want to look like in ten years' and 'do i want to be a dad or mom' those questions really helped me. Also if you experience gender dysphoria thats a big indicator to.
