Hello Why is it considered homophobia for a straight man not to like being asked out by gay man (even though he's okay with gay people being gay together) and seen as homophobia if the gay man continues to sexually assult/harass him? I mean, if a straight man asks out a lesbian woman she isn't seen as against-men or straights for saying no, and he is seen as sexually assultive/harassment if he continues. Shouldn't the equivalent of lesbian woman's right to say no and not be pressured be extended to straight men (and everyone else) without the use of pressurising language like "homophobia" when it isn't really to make the straight man be okay with something to him he really isn't? You can probably read my value bias that to gay men who treat straight men this way that isn't okay but please read through that to answer the question.
I've never really encountered the notion that minding anyone's continued unwanted advances is homophobic. Obviously straight men get to say no too. I've never heard anyone say otherwise. Frankly I've had quite a few straight women confess their love for me, even after I came out, and it always made me feel uncomfortable and sort of resentful so I can definitely relate.
It is not considered homophobic for a heterosexual man not to like being asked out by a gay man. Although, in some cultures where homophobia is endemic it it might actually be so. Any man or any woman can dislike attention from whomever they like. If someone keeps coming on to / keeps attempting to ask out someone who has said no already then that is harassment. The hetero man who dislikes any attention from a gay man may or may not be homophobic, but that is another thing entirely.
Is it not? I always thought if someone says no, it means no. And people who think men can't or shouldn't say no are assholes. Doesn't matter what your label is, you should never feel pressured to do anything with someone.
No means no. And I think a lot of straight men would probably be uncomfortable, perhaps threatened, by being asked out by a guy. Certainly there's some internalized homophobia there, which isn't OK, but is also somewhat understandable, especially given that some gay men are assholes with no boundaries who will go to any lengths to try and get straight guys in the sack. Same goes for lesbians asking straight women out, or straight men asking straight (or lesbian) women out... no means no, and if one is unduly persistent, it's harassment.
Are they really straight, though, if they're on a gay person's radar? I'd think there would be real fear, considering how straight men react to this sort of thing. I mean, there are "straight guys" who troll gay dating sites, bars, and such, while some men are on the ambiguous side.
True but that being said Heterosexual men usually make it homophobic by opening up their loud fucking mouth and yell out stuff like I'm not gay or get away faggot. Letting everyone in the damn area know that they are not gay and bringing attention to themselves all because they wanted everyone around them to know that they aren't gay. I also rarely see or hear a gay man asking more than once at least from my experience they aren't like hetero men that keep going after the women even after they say no multiple times.
We have to take people at their word. Let's take your scenario for a moment... a deeply closeted gay guy, who may not even be accepting or acknowledging of himself as gay at this point. It is absolutely wrong to be persistent with someone like this. I also don't think that one can assume a guy is gay (in 2018) simply because he is in a gay bar. Straight couples come in to gay bars. Comfortable, straight gay guys come in with their gay friends. And there are people who, even though they might absolutely pin everyone's gaydar, either aren't gay, or aren't ready to accept that in themselves. These people aren't exempt from the "don't harass" rule and their wishes must be respected, unless you're an asshole.
