Ways to find a boyfriend

Hi, don't worry if other guys in your year are getting partners. Everyone has its own pace in these things. You shouldn't rush through these things. Just be patient a little bit and your moment (and the right person) will arrive. Obviously, try to always look around so you do not miss your occasions.

If you want to lose weight it's fine, but don't forget that there are people out there that don't mind if you are a bit overweight. (I am one of those people). I think the most important advice is that you should be confident in yourself. If you like your aspect, it would be easier for others to like you as well.

That was the biggest problem for me. Check if your school organize some LGBTQ+ events or if there are events for LGBTQ+ in your town in Facebook. This would be a way to enter in the community and feel less lonely.

 

Try to embrace your imperfection first before finding someone who will love you as you are. There's nothing wrong if you want to lose weight, but do this not because you want to please the people around you, try to do it for yourself.

 

Given what you have said about the school you attend and the area where you live, it doesn't make much sense to focus on finding a boyfriend right now. Instead, I would focus on self-acceptance and just making lots of friends.

When you're in a safer place, I would suggest participating in lots of activities that you enjoy, especially those that are LGBTQ related. You shouldn't attempt to "get a boyfriend." Instead, make lots of friends, be loyal and kind, and be as outgoing as possible. By doing those things, you will find guys that are attracted to you and you to them, and the rest will take care of itself.

 

First , its good you want to lose weight, being healthy is never a bad idea. I fight to maintain my figure but its worth it. Looking good and feeling good builds confidence, plus you get to wear cute clothes.

Second, I feel your pain I went through school in the closet, I didnt come out until I was 19 years old and out on my own, 1000 miles from my parents. Sometimes you need a big move to re-invent yourself.

Third, Im in the same boat as you are, craving for love and a man of my own, Im in love with my best friend but Im too afraid to tell him; its been 9 years of unrequited love and its killing me, I cry a lot because of it. Just dont rush in the the gay scene looking for love and instead getting the shaft "literally" being used and hurt, there are some nice guys out there but a lot of assholes too.

What I found helps with confidence is being at the top of your game at something. Im a top bitch barber, Im very good at my job and I probably have too much confidence and Im a bit of a diva. What are you good at? Do it like a boss and own it.

 

I agree with 'I'm Gay', it is more important for you to be healthy and find healthy relationships which could just be friends. I came out when I was 20 and found a boyfriend who I am still dating 3 yrs later. It is a lot of work, it could put more stress on you if you do not already have some sort of support system of friends and what not.

As for the body thing, if you want to get in nshape more power too you bro! You should always be in a position to accept yourself but there is no reason to not have a workout and eating regimine for a healthy body... not a ridiculous workout 3hrs everyday on 1200 calories... anyway you get the point..

Online dating has a bad connotation but I found my boyfriend on ######.... and some pretty cool people who I am just friends with.

I think being gay especially as you comeout and seek first relationships can really take a toll on your mind and you become very preoccupied with it (you in this case is my experience with me). So find some cool hobbies and just try to be yourself and comfortable in your own skin. Whatever happen... happens... good luck man!

 

Hey @Joe2001 , I know exactly what you mean. I'm in the process of getting back into shape myself, I'm looking to get a boyfriend for the first time to try it out. I'm attracted to fit guys, they don't have to be that's just what I am usually attracted to. So in my mind it doesn't make sense to want to be with someone who is fit when I'm not. Keep working on you in all aspects of your life and I'm sure your boyfriend will come around sooner than later. And I really do believe what they say about how you will find a relationship when you aren't looking for one. Good luck

 

Hey mate,

There's already a great article covering this - https://forum.emptyclosets.com/inde...a-relationship-simpler-than-you-think.284150/

The lest long-winded advice I can give you is to start making friends - that opens up your social circle a lot more. I know it's hard, just remember it takes time.

 

You make boyfriends the same way you make regular friends. Start with a common interest and hangout, if that goes well then have a date, if the date goes well then maybe get physical.

I'm so happy to say my absence has been due to my seeing a guy. I followed my own advice, nothing serious yet.

 

I’m older in life and just came out... I have the same dilemma. I feel my time is now for finding someone, but I’m never in a place to even meet a guy. However, I keep my spirits up and am willing to travel to at least find a gay population.

You are young, you have so many chances to find someone- I’m a little jealous. The fact that you are looking will open up many opportunities!!! I guess we all have a chance at love, and it will probably present itself when we least expect it. Regardless of age, I guess we are not patient and convince ourselves it will never happen... I am sure it will for all of us!!!

 

You will find love! Just being young and looking, love will be there for you. You might think there are no gay guys around you because of your school, but given the gay population is 5 - 10% the chances of other gay guys around you is pretty good. Are you out at school? If people know you’re gay, they might better approach you. If you can’t be out keep looking and making friends, one of them is bound to be gay. I have confidence in you!!! I know how you feel- I want a gay friend/companion right now and I’m worried it won’t happen, but it will!!! I suppose I could go on a dating site or travel to a city with a gay bathhouse, but that’s not my style... I plan on trying a gay bar next weekend and a Pride event this coming summer. Because you want someone, you have conquered the toughest part- never looking will net you never finding. Good luck to both of us!