So I've started self harming because I have fallen in love with a close friend of the same sex and I feel guilty for doing so. I've come to the conclusion that I must tell him as I can see him and another friend starting to worry about me and he's asking me whats up a lot. Can somebody please tell me how to tell him? I want to make it least awkward as possible, I'll be messaging him.
Hi, first if all, stop the self harming. That won't help. It will only make things worse. Is there someone you can go to talk with? A parent, a counsellor, a doctor, a friend? Will telling the friend that you like him help or make things worse? I don't know the answer to this. But perhaps discussing things with someone before you tell him might be best... Hey, he might understand and it might help to tell him, or another friend first. Think about it... Do tell us about it. But do stop self harming. Any scarring from self harming is not something that you will want to to have in the future. Self harming is a secret cry for help that goes unanswered. So, seek out real help. P!ease...
I've already talked to a few people about the self harm, and frankly, no one really cares. I've talked to another lesbian friend of mine about the self harm and specifically about him and she says that I should tell him and obviously not to self harm etc etc. Nothing I do to help myself works. I keep on resorting to self harm because I feel so angry at myself for loving him. Words cannot describe how badly I want to tell him but the thought of doing that makes me feel incredibly guilty.
It's OK to love or like someone of the same sex or different sex. The fact that you feel angry about it shows that you are not handling it. Scream into your pillow, but please do not self harm. I care about you and I am sure that any one that reads what you have written here will, too. Please, if you are in education, phone up the student helpline, and visit the help centre for an emergency appointment. If you are not in education then visit any GP Centre for an emergency appointment, or phone NHS 111. You do need help. Can you phone or visit a LGBT help centre?
I'm 16, so I'm not really sure what to do considering my age. I really appreciate your understanding by the way, thank you for that.
It's awkward at your age to speak with a counsellor. But any conversation that you have with one would be private. If your school has one then make an appointment. Or they might offer a phone cancelling service - and they might let you make that call or receive it in a private room. If it's a phone counselling service then you can be given a general or specialist counsellor, or start with one and move on to another.
