Attraction to a "type"

It’s interesting to think about personality. I have a tough personality to deal with and I’m aware of this, meaning those first few months I joke I’m a flight risk. Since I’m self-protective and not prone to vulnerability due to some tough shit I’ve dealt with, I’m incredibly guarded although I don’t always appear that way.
As a result, I’m attracted to women who are patient, emotionally strong (or appear that way. Sometimes it’s just an appearance), empathetic and are into advocacy and activism, funny, and are independent. So mix ideals with the looks and it’s a complex package.
I figure someone will come along eventually.

 

I feel the same way. Ive definitely been into girls who don't fit the exact package before but only after ive known them a while...

 

I think this is because stunning looks catch our eyes and attention but personality steals our heart.

 

For sure.

 

I like women with long dark hair and dark eyes and it helps if they are a total badass (Wonder Woman!)

However I think it is when I get to know someone that I really fall for them. I definitely prefer femme woman but am also attracted to some tom boys too (like Shane from the L Word). ;-)

 

For me its femme- soft and kind.

 

I don't know if I have anything specific to add to this thread, other than to agree with many of the previous responses.

I would say that our "types" can change or broaden over time. I am attracted to a very different type of guy now, compared to 15-20 years ago and that's something I would have never imagined happening. There is something to be said for remaining open minded and flexible when we are playing the dating game (if we can).

 

Yes, the Catalyst. I didn't know she was my type until I met her (well, didn't even know I liked women) but since then I look for her in everyone. And it's not by decision, when I see a woman like her, it's a physical reaction. It may be that I'm not over her but it was so unlikely I'd be attracted to her in the first place so I often wonder what it all means...

 

wonder woman is a great type to have

 

If only I could find her irl

A few weeks ago I took my kid along to a superhero thing and WW was there. She was hot af. Is that terrible? Haha.

 

Yes! Being open-minded and flexible is REALLY important, to stay open to the possibilities. There may be a really, really good person out there who doesn't match "the type".

Many years ago, a therapist was really, really helpful for me, and of course I had respect and appreciation for him. A few years after that, I found myself drawn toward a man who physically resembled the therapist. As I learned more about this man, I discovered I should NOT have anything to do with him. So much for my visual impressions!

 

HAH no that's awesome. She's stunning

 

I should upload the photo I took of her!

 

wait, was it the real Gal Gadot? Or a lookalike? Id turn into putty if I saw her IRL

 

OMG! I wish it was Gal Gadot! Hahaha.

No, just someone dressed up as WW. The outfit is pretty hot though

 

@Soundofmusic , @dirtyshirt84 ,

You guys crack me up! Here I am trying to be "flexible," lol.

While you're talking about photos with hot ladies, please find me a Rachel Maddow lookalike and take a photo. She's the spitting image of my catalyst. I can't even watch her show anymore, lol.

 

As it happens, I went to a meetup yesterday (not LGBT) and there was a woman who very much reminded me of the catalyst. It was quite uncanny - the same way she held her head, the same laugh, same mouth, same gestures... Couldn't stop looking at her and found her very attractive physically although not really her personality. Can't help thinking how would I see her if I didn't know my C?

 

Interesting. Would you still want to pursue something with her?

The last woman I went out with reminded me of my catalyst except she didn’t have the confidence or ability to articulate her wants and needs. I’m still attracted to her, which annoys me because I like honest people (she’s not a liar... just I don’t know).

 

I understand the issues regarding honesty. My ex drove me crazy with those issues...not straight up lying, but definitely failing to give full disclosure on topics that where somewhat important. I never felt she was open or vulnerable. People don't understand that being misleading by not being giving all the facts regarding an issue can have the same result as lying. I would much rather have someone tell me they're not comfortable talking about some issue than being misleading about it.
Oh well, live and learn!

 

oohhhh nice. she's awesome.

I guess I sort of have two very distinct types, both out of my league LMAO:
-Type 1 (Light haired brunettes): Natalie Portman, Alicia Vikander, Dominique Provost-Chalkley, Arielle Charnas, Sara Bareilles
-Type 2 (Asian/middle eastern): Shay Mitchell, Sarah Shahi, Vanessa Hudgens, Hannah Simone, Jamie Chung

But it's all about personality