hey so im a 25 yr old female and iv been with my husband for 8 yrs married for 2yrs not happily al the time only have sex about 1x every couple of months This is the first im iv ever talked about this out loud. Very insecure about it idk what to do or thing. Iv always thought girls were attractive but in my house hold it was all NONO about lgbt.. I never really had a dating life. I had some flings with guys but never anything serious. Meet my husband at 19 be together ver since idk if i was missing something or wanting something but now I regret things. When i was in high school a gay girl in my marching band always wanted to hit on me. I always wanted to brush it off. Girl always hit on me idk if it cause my radding the “gaydar” and they know but idk. I had a girl yesterday at work say man if you were my girl friend id love those nails(just got my nails done they are super hot) and it made me thing, “ what if i was your gf “ iv been thinging about it ever since. I have the whole “gay look” it sucks to say but i have short pixi hair mohawk im a bigger girl with big boobs and lesbians always hit on me which is fine. Lol Iv always watched lesbain porn Now i look and guys and be like damn hes hot id do him but same with girls too Im so confused Any help will be amazing
Hi, Cupcake14. Your stuation sounds a lot like mine in certain aspects. I was in a relationship with a man for 5 years and I was really unhappy in it. I avoided sex at all costs because I didn't like to have sex with him and it wasn't pleasant, even though I tried to convince myself that it was. I've always been attracted to women, but I guess I was in denial. From your description, I would say that you don't sound too comfortable and confident in your current relationship, but I might be wrong. Anyway, only you can decide what course you want your life to take and no one can tell you if you are really gay but yourself. It's okay to be confused, just make sure that you handle things with care. Is this something you would ever discuss with your husband? Is he someone you can talk to?
I wanted to ask the same thing AnimeFreak4 did - have you discussed any of your feelings with your husband? I know how hard that can be. I (recently-ish) had to have a conversation with my husband about my sexuality. That is one place you can start - as long as you feel comfortable and safe having that discussion with him. Also ... I know that growing up in a household that says being gay is not okay can really skew your perspective on yourself and your own feelings. I also grew up in a house where it would have been unacceptable to bring a woman home. This caused me to push a lot of feelings down and not really explore them as openly as I wish I had. I had to keep telling myself that my feelings mattered and that I had to take my family out of the equation to be able to dig deep down and figure out what I felt was truly okay for myself. I am not even all the way there, so I understand about it being confusing - and I am sorry you had to deal with that growing up.
Hey that is a tricky situation you are in. Nobody here can tell you whether you are gay or bi or what but we can help you work through it. I think you have to try in a way to separate your relationship and your sexuality as they are both separate issue whilst at the same time linked. You sound unhappy in your relationship, has it always been like that? If not how long has it been like that? In the beginning were you attracted to your husband? As for your sexuality, if you imagine being with a girl how does that make you feel?
I think this is really stellar advice, and a perfect way to approach the situation. This just made me reflect on the way I have been looking at my marriage and my sexuality.
Thanks, I hope you find the clarity and answers you are looking for in regards to your own marriage and sexuality.
I am 38 been wit my husband for 15 year 2 kids and the last few months ive been feeling i perfer woman. My sex life wit my husband has never been good and now i know why .so i understand how u feel
