I’ve found a trans support group within travelling distance to where I live. It seems to be quite active and there are clear group rules about not identifying anyone, and not sharing info etc. I think it would be good to go and would let me speak to people irl who would understand and also give me a chance to try out a preferred name etc. BUT, I’m not out (apart from partly to one friend). I’m still presenting as female and I am just so incredibly nervous at even the thought of going. It’s the whole not feeling ‘trans enough’ thing which I know is silly but still occupies so much of my mind. I’m also slightly terrified of being outed, even with the group policies in place. For anyone that has gone to support groups like this, did you go before you were out? What was your experience like?
Im in a similar situation as you. Im going to a trans support group next week for the first time and I'm barely out to anyone. But a lot of these groups from what I've heard have a variety of people at different stages of transition. I would try not to worry too much and take the leap since its definitely a great way to meet other trans people. You definitely don't need to be out at all to attend these types of groups. Thats really why they exist as a safe space for those who need it. At least thats my impression. Im right there with you.
we have people in our group who are not out, me included except in safe places. I present as Male, everyone in the group calls me Sarah, even though I first introduced myself with my birth name. they are supposed to be safe places where you can explore, and network with others who are or have been going through the same as you. we have all been there hun. getting outed is a fear we all wrestle with, as soon as you tell someone that you are trans, or gay, bi, etc and are still in the closet they have that ability, but if its a friend, they should be trustworthy. all the best hun.
Yes it was good and also really validating to try out name and pronouns in person, way more so than I had expected. I’m definitely going back when I can!
that is sooo awesome. and yes so affirming to say your name and pronouns in an accepting safe place. it gets easier too. last friday i went to an art opening, and when folks asked my name i said Sarah, even though i was presenting as male. got a few looks and a couple sort of made a quick exit but i didnt give a ____________ it felt fantastic.
