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My feelings about sexism are possibly affecting the way I see my sexuality?

Discussion in 'Sexual Orientation' started by Shy95, Jan 26, 2018.

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  1. Shy95

    Shy95
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    So I'm a young female and very strongly feminist. I've been questioning my sexuality for almost 10 years and have noticed my feelings towards sexism and gender roles seem to be playing a part in the way I see my sexuality. For example, when I think of myself in a dress getting married to a man, I don't like it. It feels heavy and depressing. I wonder whether this is because I have a cynical view of straight marriage(the woman always seems to end up deprived and unappreciated and just becomes the "ball and chain"). But lesbian marriage feels a lot nicer. I wonder if this is because both people are the same sex so I feel they are more equal and free of prepackaged roles in the marriage.

    I also feel more and root for the characters in lesbian romance films more than straight romance films. I happily seek these out and watch them but I can't stand straight romance films. I find them ridiculous and naive, and I usually end up thinking the woman deserves better, and I usually hate the guy.

    In my relationship with a man now, I am very sensitive to any roles that may slip into our relationship. If anything, I like to be the more dominant one!
     
    #1 Shy95, Jan 26, 2018
  2. shadowalex

    shadowalex
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    I definitely get you on the part of not wanting to be tied down by a man. (I also hate overly romantic films for similar reasons ^^.) However I don't feel that this directly played a part in my sexuality personally ...but I do feel that my feelings towards relationship gender roles has guided me to finding people who don't push me to fulfill something because of my assigned gender. Sometimes reinforced gender roles can push someone to question their sexuality and/or gender. But then again, knowing society's expectations, this generally makes a relationship with women or (just anyone who isn't a cis man) overall more appealing. :slight_smile: Now, Im in a long-term relationship with a cis man and we're still working things out regarding gender/roles that we expect from each other.

    So on that note, have you talked to your partner about your concerns about your role in the relationship? That can help a lot.
     
    #2 shadowalex, Jan 26, 2018
    WildT likes this.
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