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How to deal with cultur shock

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Mintypie, Jan 11, 2018.

  1. Mintypie

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    i just came back from thailand (where my family lives) and am now in the Netherlands, where I live. I hate it here. There's no sense of community, everything looks grey and it just gives me the feeling of work. Its a country focused on work, which I hate. Thailand was amazing. Everyone smiled and there were food carts everywhere. The people were dancing and sound was everywhere. Now that I'm back here, I'm very down. Being in this cycle again is bringing me down and even my friends or my family can't cheer me up. I've tried taking some alone time but it didn't work either. Does anyone have tips for dealing with cultur shock?
     
  2. Humbly Me

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    Move back to Thailand? If you don't like cold countries full of grey light and work you should not live in northern Europe. Even moving to Spain or France would likely help alleviate your discomfort but you clearly hate the environment you are in and should leave.
     
  3. John C89

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    I get where you are coming from Mintypie. I'm from Brazil, borned and raised, but two years ago, I went to an exchange, and lived in UK for 1 year and 1 month. Even though I knew I was going back to Brazil, it didn't stopped me from feeling homesick sometimes...the weather was bad, it was always raining compared to where I lived, and people seemed somewhat cold with me...never answering my Fb messages, whatsapp messages, etc... don't get me wrong, everybody was polite, gentle and helped me when I needed.....but I was missing something.....the feeling of connection, good friends I could count with, the laid-back lifestyle I used to have in my country..... I realized that it was probably a wrong idea to move to any country without a good weather and more relaxed and extroverted people....to enjoy life and to find joy, I needed more. And so, now back here, I also feel my country is fucked up due to corruption, violence and loads of problems, like the worse economic crisis in history...... maybe, like myclosetisfull said, a country more down to the south will help you to adapt, live and enjoy!
     
    #3 John C89, Jan 11, 2018
    Last edited: Jan 11, 2018
  4. wickedwitch

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    Hello @Mintypie:

    I can relate somewhat as I live in a different province in Canada from the one in which I was raised. Despite being in the same country, it's a completely different culture here from that of my home province (including labour standards/vacation time) and the weather too is much more grey than at home, where rainy days are rare by comparison. In fact, the first month I was here it rained every single day and I thought to myself "what have I done?!"

    I've been here for a while now (17 years) and I don't think that homesickness ever truly goes away, it's always there right below the surface ready to be triggered by a picture or a phone call or a smell.

    That being said, I think that when I have been very deliberate about making the effort to make friends and consciously exploring my environment that I feel better. I feel more connected, more "at home". I now can see the good things about this place, things that I would miss if I left, even when there are things that irritate me. So if you want to stay, deliberately getting out and making friends/exploring might be an answer to how to make it more livable for you.

    Whatever you do, don't migrate to Canada or the US - if you think the Dutch are crazy for work, you'll think us completely mad!

    Here's a list of minimal annual leave by country:

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_minimum_annual_leave_by_country

    and a blog that might interest you:

    https://thaiwomenlivingabroad.com/

    Good luck with whatever you choose to do.

    :slight_smile:
     
  5. Mintypie

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    Let me clarify, I live in the Netherlands. I go to school there, I was raised there and my father lives here. However, my mother is Thai and we went to live there for a few months. Now I miss it a lot and I strongly dislike the Netherlands, although I have lived there almost all my life. I wish I could move back to Thailand because the environment is much more pleasant, but I can't because I still have to go through a year of high school. Maybe after high school I'll go back there, but a year is a long time to deal with.
     
  6. andimon

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    What you're dealing with isn't culture shock, but the inability to fit in the environment you were raised. That's extremely common, hence the number of people who emigrate every single year due to social or financial reasons.

    I can't really understand you since I'm pretty much a workaholic (summer breaks stop being fun after one month tops) obsessed with professionalism and the urban lifestyle.

    If I were you, I'd specialize in a field that I like and also happens to be globally relevant, and then move to whichever country fits my standards.
     
  7. Mintypie

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    Thanks, in a year or two I'll be going to university (probably) studying cultural antropology and social developement, which I find very interesting and is also globally relevant. It's simply difficult accepting that I am in an environment I don't want to be in at the moment, because moving isn't really an option regarding school. The thing I dislike the most of all this is that the people around me feel way less amazing than they felt like before I went to Thailand. It feels like I don't love them anymore while I know I do. Im scared of pushing them away because of it. Anyway, I'm going to try and make the best of it.
     
  8. bingostring

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    If you are lined up to stay in Amsterdam for your studies - turn your perspective around and just make the most of it. Fighting it - and wishing you were somewhere else - is not going to make you happy. Make a positive out of a negative. Attempt to make some new friends and new interests.
     
  9. Mintypie

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    Thanks, that's what I'm planning to do!