Since I was 7 I've always known I was attracted to girls. I'm 15 now and currently identity as bisexual. My sexuality is still tricky though. When I imagine myself in a relationship I always see my self with a women, and when I think about romantic and sexual relationships I think of women to. Marriage, kids, I see all of it with other girls. But I do find some men attractive, I don't really ever think about sex with guys but when I'm around one I think is attractive I still get nervous think about relationships .Because of this I identify as Bi, but some part of me knows that I'm gay. Then again I wouldn't entirely put down the idea of a male partner if their personality was truly amazing. At this point I just feel pressured and really just mad at myself for not just knowing who I am. Any advice?
Well only you can identify what sexuality you are. Also remember that being bi doesn't mean 50% heterosexual and 50% homosexual - it could be 85% homosexual and 15% heterosexual etc. Having said that, it's normal for people who identify as gay to find somebody of the opposite sex attractive without being attracted to them. I think the question is more about who you imagine spending that time with now and in the future and who you connect with physically AND emotionally. At the end of the day, there's no pressure to decide one way or another so try not to feel pressured. It's normal not to know exactly who we are.
For most people, especially females, sexuality is on a spectrum. You can be 'mostly gay' and still appreciate guys aesthetically, and if at some point your sexuality flips and you're more into guys you can go for that because you've always known you're into both. You've got a ton of freedom and nothing to worry about. Just as an example, I personally am bisexual and over my tween and teen life I went from being completely straight to mostly gay to completely in between. Another weird source of variation is that I tend to feel romantically attracted to guys and sexually attracted to girls, but there are lots of exceptions on both sides. It's a whirlwind, but it can be a fun and exciting one if you make it fun and exciting.
