Did many of your friends and family members conclude you were LGBTQ before you came out and let you know that when you told them? If so, what led them to reach their conclusion?
ReadyFreddy....Nope. Every person that I have come out to has done the proverbial "Double-take" or "Jaw-hit-the-floor" when I told them. I don't fit the stereotype unless you know me as well as my wife does and even she didn't believe me at first. A few days after I came out to her we talked about it and she did say then that some odd things that she had noticed over the years (married 37 years then) finally made sense! ....david
Wow. You did an amazing job of hiding it for all those years David. Thanks for sharing. Did you ever suspect someone figured it out during that time? Did you ever consider coming out when you first knew? What were the odd thing your wife noticed? I knew I was definitely gay when I was 13, but have been in deep denial for many years. I plan to finally come out this year and will be very interested in people's reactions.
I am only out to people I have met in LGBTQ+ circles. My family, friends and classmates ask me every now and then if I have a boyfriend, have met any cute guys, etc... So it does not seem as if anyone is suspecting it at all. I kind of wish they were. I think it would be easier for me to come out if people were hinting at me that they thought I might be gay. Then I wouldn't feel like it's going to be a major shock for them. As to why they don't think I'm gay? I am a feminine woman, that is probably why.
Ready Freddy....We are somewhat alike in that I knew from about age 8-10 that I liked watching boys play basketball more than I liked watching basketball! By 15 I knew what that difference was. From about 18-21 I wasn't exactly "out", but I did hookup with a lot of guys. Then when I turned 22 I decide that I would now be straight...not knowing at that time (1972) that I would spend many years in growing depression, guilt, shame and self-hate because of that choice. I got married in 1978 and finally accept myself as gay on Dec. 25, 2014. The last three years have been some of the best of my life! No...no one ever suspected. I had done such a good job of convincing even myself that I was straight that the memories of being with guys when I was younger became blocked from my memory. Those lost memories started coming back to me gradually about eight months ago. Now I have my entire life back...not knowing what had happened in those years was a real shock, but I am glad that I know now. My wife had always wondered why I liked bright colored clothes so much...shoes, shirts even jeans! I know that is stereotypical, but it sure fits in my case! ....david
Thanks Mali Mali. It seems that your family, friends and classmates do not suspect your true sexual orientation. I have been asked countless times if I have a girlfriend and have consistently said no. Since I am still not married to a woman, I assume some people suspect I am gay. I also love shopping, musicals and art, which some may conclude is uncommon for a straight man. It will be fascinating to see peoples' reactions when I finally come out. Happy New Year and good luck on your journey.
Thanks for sharing the additional information David. Glad the last three years have been so good. Sounds like you have had a very interesting time since you accepted yourself as gay. Best wishes for a fabulous 2018.
Sorry you were outed Wesley. What happened? You should have been able to choose your own course. Stay strong. Good things happen to good people. Hope you get the support you need soon.
