I'm a lesbian I've been in a relationship for almost 8 years. The one I've been with has never been with females and said she will never be with ay other female after me. Cheating has happened a couple times with guys only, our recent break up was over a year ago, she was cheating with a guy and decided to leave the relationship. I hit her up to hang out a couple times and during that time she stated she was pregnant. She wasn't sure who the father was as she slept with 2 guys, none of them wanted anything to do with her or the baby, one went as far enough to say he would take her to the abortion clinic. I decided to stick around and help her and take responsibility for the baby. Everything was good, he's my world. My family and all my friend accept his as he is mine. Our relationship hasn't been the best we've basically been living as roommates. I finally decided to end it a month ago. Things were bad but she decided to be cordial finally(we live together) now all of a sudden last week she tells me she did ancestry to see his health(which is a lie) the first guy is her ex from back in the day and the other a coworker. She told me it wasn't her coworkers it was the guy she used to be with. All of a sudden she says she owes it to the baby for him to know who his father is. Mind you if it's the coworkers then he doesn't need to know. She asked me how I felt if he wanted to see him etc, of course I was upset because I'm his other mom and he's my world. I think she's already talking to her ex, he's African American and she baby does not look the least bit mixed. She says she's 90% sure it's his. She says this won't change anything but of course it will. I have no problem dealing with this when he's older and when he's curious. He's fine right now I get him everything he needs and wants and my family loves him extremely. So here I am, totally heartbroken and lost. The "dad" has been coming around more and more and I feel as if I've been replaced. I was supposed to get him every other weekend but when I moved out the 1st weekend I was supposed to get him she kept him because his "dad" was there. I was there when he was born, I was there for all his first, he's so close to me and he was mine. She took him away from me, now some guy who did not even want him and hasn't been around since now get's more rights then me. I'm not sure how to cope with this, the slightest memory makes me breakdown. I would love to talk to anyone who has gone through this to see how they have coped with this. Me and my family are completely heartbroken.
I'm so sorry you're going through such pain. Sending you lots of love. Hope someone can share some experiences with you
Im really sorry this happened to you. Since you live in the states and you and your girlfriend aren't married I don't think you have any parental rights unless you adopted him as a spouse of the parent, even if you feel he is more your son than his father's since you've been there for him since his birth. If his assumed-dad is coming to see him often and you said your girlfriend cheated on someone else in the past she might be cheating on you in some form. Tread lightly and I hope theres a light at the end of the tunnel for you soon. Good luck.
I'm really sorry to hear that you and your family are going through this. It must be a horrible situation. Hopefully there will be someone with similar experience to offer advice. In the meantime, you can always post on here.
I'm so sorry for your pain and grief. As a mother I can't imagine losing a child this way. Even though he is not yours biologically, you have been his parent no doubt. Sending you strength to face this.
