Hey all, so I'm going to be hitting age of majority soon where I live, which means I'll be able to legally change my name/gender marker/etc. I've been really thinking about changing my last name as well, since it's tied to someone who's only my father biologically. We haven't spoken in 6 years and I'm pretty sure neither I, my sister, or him considers him our father anymore. I've been thinking about changing it to my stepdad's last name, but I'm not 100% sure about it either. I know if I don't, I'll never hear the end of it considering how family is "so important" to him. (Where was that importance when I came out, I wonder?). Anyways, I was just wondering other people's thoughts on this. Is changing a last name something people tend to do? Is there really any reason to do so or to not do so?
I'm changing my last name because I don't really feel connected to it, it's hard to spell, and I just plain don't like it. It's absolutely up to you.
Like Tim said, it's entirely an personal choice and there is no "right" or "wrong" answer here. I've heard of trans people who have changed their surname for similar reasons. Whether it was for a disconnect with the name/family or simply phonetic reasons. Personally, I went through a phase where I wanted to change it. But every other name I thought I'd claim felt empty and foreign. So I decided to stay with my given. Though, ironically, I was told by my father that if I were changing my first name, I should go ahead and change my last name too. Which I didn't end up doing. I felt that,even though I may be estranged from some of my family because of my decision to transition, I will always still be a part of my family. I refuse to burn that bridge, and part of that bridge - for me - is in the name.
Thought about changing my last name. Haven't done it, at least not yet. Also have thought about just plain dropping the last name. Just having a first name, or a singular name.
I plan on changing my last name. My parents have different last names, so I plan to just switch to the other parent's surname. I'm doing it mostly because the other last name is better (in my opinion) than my current one, and also for my peace of mind, so it's harder for me to be connected to my pre-transition self (I want to go stealth).
I plan on taking my partner's last name when we can afford to get the legal process going because I resent both my parents, and having to bear their names is insulting to me.
i would say do what ever is best for you, if he left 6 years ago and you have such little contact or positive contact. i'd be of the opinion that he vacated any claim to you, so you are the one in charge here, you have the power. HUGS.
