Hi everyone, i'm new here. I wanted to share my story with you. This summer i started questioning my gender indentity. I'm asigned female but i allways wanted to be a boy. I'm 15 and i never wanted to wear dresses and makeup and all that girly stuf. I started imaginating myself as a boy everyday. Like i said this summer me and my close friend (girl) spent soo much time together. Every day it was more and more harder for me. I asked myself why i keep thinking of her and every night she come close to me i feel butterflies and just lose control. One night we kissed and since then (3 months) i can't stop thinking am i transgender or lesbian. Ik she is straight but she used to sit on my lap with her face turned in front of me everytime it was harder for me. I liked that i didn't want that to stop but i knew that i can't do that i said myself 'You are girl tf are u doing stop'. She even used to touch me down there but when i touch her she was like stop please. One night i wanted to tell her everything and come out. I texted her and told her i need to see her rn and tell her something important. She was busy so she asked me next day but i rejected to tell her... I'm so scared now. I think i'm trans because i always wanted to be a boy and now she even made it worse. I'm stressed, don't talk to much friends in new school. They say i'm too quiet but i just don't feel right like a girl. I'm scared to tell my parents but i want to talk to someone and to see if i should start taking hormones. Sometimes she asks me what's bothering me and i often say nothing at all. Should i tell my parents that i'm trans. I already did some research about it. Ryan Flores inspired me. Should i tell her my feelings even if i risk of losing her as a friend? I only told my internet friend my problem and he is very supportive for me. Should i first tell my mom or my friend(that girl i have crush on)? Ps. I think my mom noticed that i don't like going in public like all teenagers do and she started asking me about that but i often say 'I don't know'. Girl noticed that i started treating her well and i do everything for her. I think she knows that i like her.... Please tell me what to do. I'm soo sad.
Ok you can be a girl and not want to be a girly girl you don’t have to change your body to a boy to not be femme. Have you tried experimenting with your look so dress more masculine etc to see if you feel more like you or is it more your body you don’t like? Gender identity and sexuality are different things so you need to make sure you are not getting muddled. Gender identity is usually more about the body your in where as sexuality is who you are attracted to.
Ok so have you looked at yourself naked in the mirror and imagined having no breasts, no vagina but a penis. A lot more body hair and facial hair. A deeper voice. Maybe a more muscular build. How does that make you feel? I wasn’t overly happy with my body as a teenager and I doubt many are but with time I learnt to be comfortable in my own skin. I’m not a girly girl either but wouldn’t want a mans body so just express who I am by how I dress and act.
Oh ok it does sound like you could be trans. I would try posting or having a look through the gender identity section for guidance. If you find you are only attracted to women then I guess you would be a lesbian but if you transition and become a man then I guess you would be straight but to be honest I wouldn’t worry too much about labels at the moment as you can figure out your sexuality later.
Tysm, you helped me a lot, i'm still not 100% sure so i'll wait a lil and inform myself more about transitioning. I'm not ready to come out....
I'm atracted to woman, like i said i like that girl sm but i just can't imagine myself as a female and lesbian... First i was atracted only for boys then i started questioning myself because i liked girls too. Now i'd say i'm 80% atracted to girls but still know i'm female and i'm unsure abt other 20%. I can't imagine myself as a girlfriend.
Ok give yourself time I was like that at first I couldn’t see myself as a girlfriend but as time had past and I’ve thought about it more it feels more natural. Maybe try and watch some films or tv series with female couples in to see if that helps. You don’t have to come out to anyone until you are ready, you are very young and have plenty of time to figure things out.
