im 19 and ive been on T for almost four years now. ive been sexually active since i was 14 and have never been able to orgasm with any sexual partner ive ever had, even before hormones. the only time im able to is with masturbation. i dont know why this happens or how to fix it. advice?
ill add more since no ones saying anything. penetration hurts even though i like the idea of it and it has felt ok in the past, clitoral stimulation is the only thing that really works for me but whenever other people do that it doesn't have the same effect as when im doing it myself. does anyone have any tips for what i can do to actually enjoy sex for once? please im pretty lost and literally anything would help.
Hi Comapill, Penetration shouldn't be painful, unless they are too rough and impatient or you are not physically ready/lubricated enough. If you find that you always experience pain then it might be worth seeing a doctor about. as for reaching orgasm, I also struggle with that. I can orgasm with others but it generally takes a considerable amount of concentration on my part. I know it sounds awkward, but maybe directing them either physically or verbally to position them properly or get them using the techniques you enjoy. Help them out, tell them what you like and how you like it. You can do this by using your hand to direct their movements or subtly repositioning your body so it feels more like you want it to, or just tell them. I also found that, for me at least, at lot of my problems stem from not being relaxed enough / wanting to lose control in front of others. I need to force myself to be in the moment and to just relax and enjoy, often closing my eyes and visualizing like I would when masturbating rather than watching with my eyes.... if that makes sense. by closing my eyes I'm forcing myself to concentrate on and feel whats happening more than if i was watching. but, everyone is different, you might be the complete opposite and need the visual stimulation. Just do whatever you need to do to relax and be in the moment.
