i feel like i don't fit in with gay girls??

I can kind of see where you come from as most queer ladies I know fits the "vegan, artsy, feminist" type, though I generally assume that ALL women are feminists by nature but in reality each woman is different and the fact that they may like poetry and drawing doesn't mean that they can't enjoy a great movie or wouldn't binge-watch the seven seasons of GOT with you.

I am a feminist, I do enjoy reading and I do have a ball debating with people about social issues or commenting about a good book I've read BUT I also spend an unealthy amount of time in bed eating sweets and watching movies/series and playing video games.

I think most people like to promote what they think will be seen as good trait by other women " feminism, veganism, activisim, art" vs what they think could be portray as "weaknesses" by others such as admitting that they like less 'mentally challenging' activities such as " playing video games or watching silly sitcoms while eating their weight in food". It doesn't mean that they don't do it, just that they are less likely to admit it.

Just go out there and be yourself, I am sure plenty of girls will enjoy lazy nights/weekend, laying in bed and watching movies ( I know I would!)

 

I sometimes feel that way around gay guys, just based on things like speech patterns, dress, musical taste, dislike of drag shows and clubs, and my love of sports. It's like I act gayer than most straight guys but straighter than most gay guys. Sometimes I have to be like "No really guys I swear I do like dick!"

It is what it is. I can get along just fine with straight guys, and there are plenty of gay guys like me who don't fit the mold. It just means I have to look a little harder and in some different places to find them.

 

Are you into sports or have any hobbies where you can meet people more your type? Tried online dating? I'm still figuring out my sexuality but I'm no girly girl and would rather watch movies / Netflix all day than talk about books poetry and artsy stuff. I guess I'm what they call a soft butch and femme girls would intimidate me. I've tried to be more like them and fit in but am coming to the conclusion that I should just be me.

 

Hey I get what you are saying but really we are out there. Where are you usually searching for girls?

 

Do you click with guys or straight girls?Are movies your only pass time? What do you talk about with your friends? What specifically about movies do you like?

I agree with Linning, you're probably only hearing what lesbians perceive as being the most socially appealing qualities in themselves. They be only expressing what they believe others will relate to. They may be too embarassed to mention their likes and loves as well. Until you talked about the things you love, they may not mention how much the love x and y movie/series. I have a bad habit of not bringing up the things I like until I know the other person likes it.

If you feel like you don't relate to others or don't have much to talk about, try learning a new skill or expanding your interests. It could be artsy, but maybe it's a sport, maybe cooking, a science, maybe it's improv, writing, comedy, maybe film criticting, or a film related skill or club. You could just voulenteer at something. Pick something that could be interesting or at least challenging. It almost doesn't matter what you do, the more you learn and experience the more you have something to talk about. Whether it's knowledge or just your perception of the experience. A lot of conversation is just sharing your unique view of the world. The more you experience and do, the more you have to share.

 

There are lesbians of all types.

I am artsy but still feel I don't fit in with lesbians as I have very little sex drive and no interest in radical feminist or LGBT politics. So yeah, it happens.

 

Do you have a favourite movie? Genre?
I like scorsese gangster flicks

 

I feel the same way as you. All the girls I know would rather spend the day in a mall shopping for dresses or stuff... I like video games and eating chinese takeout at hone while watching YouTube videos. I don't even fit in with any of the girls in my dance class because they're all super girly, and I don't even know if I AM a girl... the word just feels wrong sometimes. But boy doesn't always feel right either, and I don't exactly click with any of the guys I know. It seems as if all of my interests are unique to me, even though I know that's not the case. I just feel like an outcast.

 

I am both sides, i like dressing up, love reading, especially crime books, yesni like to draw, but i also like getting my hands dirty like literally, finding worms, or going fishing, i like shows like once upon a time, criminal minds the original one, ncis, original, how to train your dragon, i have never met anyone like me, i was adopted by blood relatives, but still i feel like an alien, especially being raised in a religion that says yes its okay to like same sex but no you cant be with same sex, which is made worse by my severely homophobic mother, i dont yet drive, because of family stuff but will drive soon, i dont know any lgbt people, obviously because of family, and well, yeah

 

Since coming out I’ve feel lost. I always would rather stay home. This Sunday I binged watched Stranger Things. All eight episodes. I really feel like I have no idea what I’m doing.

 

Jenne, you described the type of "queer" woman that is boring me to death on okc. I'm sure there are millions of non-vegan, non-radical-left-feminist-fighter, non-artsy and not terribly heteronormative looking lesbians on this planet. Here's one of them.

 

I like hanging out all day watching movies. But I think I would have a hard time with gay girls. Most just see me as a friend. And that's ok too. But once it feels like it's going beyond friendship is the tricky part. I had that problem back when I was at college. Guys mistook my kindness for love. And I'm just a kind loving person. I had no intention for that to happen. And I would have to look at what I said or did to try and prevent it from happening again.

 

I feel like I'm you as well. I've noticed that a lot as well. Just keep fishing.