I'm a 16 year old girl and i feel so lost. I just broke up with my 1 year long boyfriend when realising i loved him but was never in love with him (didnt feel any lust) . I dont even know if i even liked him very much. Tbh if im at all gay in some way, i wouldnt mind if i was bi because then i would still like guys and especially for family and stuff so it could be 'hidden' in some way. Reasons why i think I could be bi/gay: -I've only got obsessed with female celebrities and fangirling -I might have had a crush/infatuation with a girl but she's 21(for some reason i only get 'crushes' on girls who are like at least 4,5 years older than me -I can only read this particular string of lesbian clexa (The 100) fan fiction but i intentionally dont read the smut bits. -only had crushes on the 'obvious' straight girl types and never on the stereotypical lesbians. -This new guy likes me but i don't think i like him, i dont know. -I've only gotten butterflies with my 2 real life people girl crushes. Reasons i could be straight: -Never had a crush on a girl my age -Kissed a girl but felt nothing. -Only had like 6 but only guy 'sex dreams'. -Any dreams to do with any of my girl crushes have never been sexual, only like becoming good friends with them. -I've only felt 'lust' with one guy but that was when i was 13 so maybe hormones hadn't kicked in yet? I have never told anyone this and i guess i'm only brave enough because this is virtual so i would appreciate your thoughts xx
You are still quite young so there is no rush to figure everything out now. Could you be thinking you like girls because you didn’t like your boyfriend as much as you expected? It could be that you haven’t met the right guy for you yet. There is nothing wrong with having crushes on celebs and other girls, it’s whether you want anything to happen. Have you imagined what it would be like to kiss a girl, date etc how does it feel compared to thinking the same about guys?
Excuse my English as it is not my first language. I think you should just give it time. I'm 32 years old and I'm still not sure what I am either. So, if it's hard for me to fully understand my sexuality, I bet it's hard for you as well. Don't over think this whole situation, it's better to just 'feel' and experience. Time will tell....Good luck!