Weird gender feelings (even though I'm cis)?

Yeah i'm in a similar boat. Always hated girls clothes, hated pink, hated princess, hated being forced into dresses when mom decide to start taking us to church every sunday. I'm just lucky my mom let me have books and toys i liked - a bike, dinosaurs, space, and animals mostly.

I've never liked most girls clothes either, and growing up i simply wrote this off as being raised to dress conservatively - i told myself i just wasn't comfortable with a low cut neckline or a shirt that had too thin fabric (and would therefore show my bra or undershirt). But i always was drawn to the boys' clothes, i thought all of it was cool and really wanted to be able to wear it instead. Graphic shirts, plaid and button ups with undershirts, the jackets, all of it.

Growing up i felt a general disconnect to my gender - like it was wrong to be grouped with them, like i wasn't like them, wasn't one of them, but that was as far as it went for most of my childhood. My friends were always tomboys or boys, or at the very least girls who weren't at all girly. I would get body dysphoria as a tween/teen from time to time, but it was never top dysphoria only bottom dysphoria. I was quick to write this off, just as quick as i was about being attracted to girls, and easily convinced myself that i was just curious and that it was totally normal surely other girls think that too but are too embarrassed to voice it.

I'm not 100% confident in any label yet. I'm experimenting with things i have always wanted to try, like men's clothes. I have 2 men's shirts right now and a bunch coming in the mail. I ordered a binder, too, because at this point just wanting to know how it feels to wear it and the men's clothes i have coming will feel has become a need. I used to be fine with wearing feminine cut shirts but now i have a marked preference for the men's shirts...though pronouns only bother me half the time. Half the time i correct them in my head, the other half it doesn't phase me at all.

The point being, i feel ya and its confusing as hell. But you've come to the right place! Everyone here is really helpful and insightful, they've helped me find myself. I feel like i'm living my teen years finally, in my twenties, but oh well.

 

See, I feel like I'm in the opposite circumstance with the same result. I've never really minded identifying with femininity, but now all of a sudden it seems that I've been trying to get away from that because it just doesn't feel as comfortable, but masculinity doesn't feel comfortable for me either.

As for gender-neutral formal wear, if you're trying to look as least conspicuous and most androgynous as possible, I recommend longer dresses that flatten in the chest.

 

Gender expression (masculinity/femininity) does not equal gender identity (male/female). If you are fine with a female body, despite hating the stereotypes that go with being female, then you are female. Perhaps use this forum to get help on expressing your masculine side.

 

Oh my, I relate so much to this.

During puberty, I did not like how my body felt, it was too... soft? Especially breasts; I never felt comfortable with wearing something that would accentuate or expose them too much. I remember how I wished I didn't have them at all. Later, for some years I was fine with them (they are small anyway), but lately I have been feeling this need to wear a sports bra in order to flatten them out completely. Now I really want my chest to be flat; I'll probably invest in a binder.

As to hair, I've always had it short (about on a same line with a chin), and still do.

I've always liked gender-neutral or even more masculine clothing. I remember how at school some small kid saw me in a shirt, jacket and short hair and started asking his classmates whether I was a guy or a girl, and that made me feel kind of flattered. A similar thing happened recently with some adults and other kids, I was wearing a loose t-shirt and long coat-like jacket. They asked each other out loud "is it he or she", and I just smiled or said "guess".

The thing is I still feel quite insecure about my body. Thankfully, it is not that curvy and is actually quite slim and androgynous, but whenever I compare it with some male bodies, I feel bitter, somewhat jealous and sad.

I don't think I'm trans, it's just... I guess if I was born a male, I would never think about being a female.

But as OP mentioned, I was born with a girl's body, so I'll just roll with it, making small alterations in my appearance here and there in order to be in harmony with how I feel on the inside. I really love my wardrobe now; even though almost all of the clothing was bought in a female section, it is very neutral, or I'd say, with a hint of masculinity, and I was recently told that I have a masculine-presenting appearance, which was probably the biggest compliment on my appearance I have ever got.

Recently I've also got to know about a term "genderfluid", and I think it fits me really well.

 

I relate to everything said. It is annoying everything unisex is automatically "male" and the men's section often has better attire. I think the only difference for me is that I do like feminine clothes... IF done right. I'm completely cool with shopping in the men's section. I even buy boxers Seriously, no one cares! Shop away! Probably half my attire is men's/unisex. I don't consider myself transgender. I started to use an agender/non-binary label but since coming to terms with my sexuality I'm feeling more comfortable with my female gender. So I'm just kind of confused about it, but waiting it out.

As for neutral gender wear for formal occasions, I like a pair of solid colored slacks, a button up dress shirt, and a jacket if cold. It may sound like a suit, but it doesn't look it or feel it. I've worn suits and dont care much for them (too stiff). Slacks are comfy and loose fitting. With dress shirts they can be as masculine, neutral, or feminine in style and cut as you want. Solid color, stripes or shape patterns are pretty neutral as well. You could go with something with a strong ethnic vibe. Jackets, blazer, trenchcoats can be pretty gender neutral.

 

I relate to everything said here. I grew up not liking pink, or dresses, or anything girly. I wore looser clothes and even had short hair for a while. I found a photo of myself in preschool, and I looked more like a boy than a girl! Then when puberty hit, I felt awkward, like what is going on here? I didn't like my curves for a while, and I still feel awkward about them. Now I tend to dress girly for special occasions, but otherwise dress in t-shirts and jeans and hoodies.

I agree with the OP when you say that guy's clothes are cooler. I still think this now! Especially when it comes to t-shirts. Some days I like to dress more girly, and some days more masculine. I also don't like the pressure that women have to "look good" all the time, and think that women with a more natural look can look nice as well.

 

I agree to some extent. With the chest stuff during puberty I fully agree. However when I was a high school freshman i was a huge pink girly girl and now as I senior I am me. I wear a lot of leggings and plaid and hoodies and graphic tees and sweatpants and a skirt once in a while I feel like my style is hard to pin down but it's me