Hi lovely people of EC, hope you’re all doing well Reading through posts on here many of us have had a catalyst that set the ball rolling on our coming out journey. Me and mine are still very much involved in each other’s lives and have a strong, trusting friendship (and yes we’re still sleeping together) Has anyone gone on to have a relationship with their catalyst? If so how did it work out? Are you still together? We haven’t sat and discussed exactly what our friendship is/means and both have a lot of stuff going on in our lives at the moment. We care a lot for each other and spend most of our spare time together. We’re both content with how things are. Am I making a big deal out of it?
Hey I didn't have quite the same thing with a catalyst so I'm not sure I'm very qulaified to answer. What is it you feel is making you wonder this question though? Do you want more? If she wanted to make it official would you want that?
We’ve known each other years but things got ‘complicated’ about a year ago. I suppose I just don’t want to lose her.
Yeah, she went through a breakup around the same time as me so we were kind of each other’s catalyst. I’ve always known I was gay, she’s not sure. There’s no pressure from either of us at all. Maybe I’m just having a bit of a head f*ck
I don't think it's necessarily a head f*ck I just think you have obviously become very close to her both in the intimacy side of things and also the support side of things. I think it's only natural to sometimes be fearful you might lose that. Haha she is still not sure she likes girls? Do we need to have a chat with her haha I'm only joking. She is obviously dealing with breakup and sexuality issues which is fine, she needs to walk her own path with regards to that which it sounds like you are letting her do. Is this a recent thing that's popped into your head or do you think it has been simmering for a while?
My thought would be to enjoy what you have and once some of the complications are on their way to being sorted, you could revisit the question of your relationship if you still think it's necessary. I kind of like to keep things simple and if you're both happy and somehow working on the things that need resolving, I'd be satisfied.
It’s been simmering for a while I guess, we are spending more and more time together. @Really I agree, keeping things simple is the best course of action at the moment. Thanks for replying guys
No worries, we are always here if you need us. Sometimes when we let things just stew in our head they grow and become bigger than they should, often talking them through helps.
I don't have a catalyst, I'm one of those weird ones that just finally said one day, right, I'm gay... but I think that what you are both doing seems extremely healthy, taking things slowly, letting yourselves process your own thoughts over time. Are you wanting more? Do you want it to be more of an official relationship?
