Hi, I have many close friends on the internet and i have came out to them in chat, i have came out to a few friends via telephone but i never seen them face to face after coming out, I haven't had many friends in these years, except those Internet friends i mentioned before. But i and one of my Internet friends are going to see eachother for the first time in the next a few days, he's 18. I wanted to out to him when i meet him face to face for the first time. To out face to face is something I've never done before, except my therapist and some other expections. So it's almost the first experience for me and it's special. Any advice? Which exact words i should say? Which words i shouldn't say? And after that i made my decision, he talked about lgbt people himself(in chat) and said he thinks people should respect them.... That was amazing... Sorry i talked much..
Hey, I am no expert on this, because I myself have never come out to anyone in person. I would say that, just be sure that this person is someone you can trust and someone that is willing to accept you (from your description, they sound like someone who is an ally so that's a good sign). Other than that, i wish you the best of luck if you decide to go through with it. Hope it goes well.
Considering his views of LGBTQ people, it sounds like this should go well. Just take a deep breath and remember that it's never easy to come out to anybody, so what you're feeling is natural. It's okay to be nervous. These are such personal feelings to share with someone, and as you said, it's special. I think a good way to start is by letting him know that you have something very personal to share with him. Let him know that this is hard for you to talk about. Let him know that you've never shared this with anybody before and that he means a lot to you for him to be the first person to hear it. I would have a hard time giving anyone exact words about what to say or not to say. If there was a generic sdript to come out, it would be all over the internet for easy access. Just be yourself. Talk about you. Talk about how this affects you. You could start off by referring to that conversation when he said the LGBTQ should be treated with respect and build on it. Let him know important his support is to you. It gets easier when it becomes a real conversation where you're sharing thoughts and bonding with each other, rather than you doing all the talking. After a little nervousness at the start, the discussion will flow naturally as you discover that he is accepting of you, that he will support you, and that you now have someone in the physical world who is there for you in your journey. It goes from hesitancy, to nervousness, to a world with new possibilities. Always remember there's no requirement to come out, but when you choose the right person, it can be a really positive, life affirming experience and it can take a ton of weight off your shoulders.
