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Shopping boys/mens clothes advice?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by AlexJames, Aug 28, 2017.

  1. AlexJames

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    I can wear sizes 4/6 and 8/10 womens shirts. What does this scale to in boys or men's sizes? So many times i pass the mens/boys sections and see shirts i'd love to wear but idk what sizes to look for, or fits. Like cause i'm only 5 feet tall the handful of clothes i have tried on looked big on me. I don't have a binder and although i'm interested in buying one, i'm not gonna chance it till i move out and can experiment more freely. For now i just want to buy a few shirts from the guys' sections for casual wear around the house and out and about. Like any ordinary tomboy would. But cause i'm tiny i feel like what i want to fit me doesn't compensate for my chest and what does looks big everywhere else. =( I mean i can go to the fitting room and try shit on no problem, but i work at walmart the store i usually shop at. Employee discount, plus there's literally nowhere else close to home to shop at. So i'd like to go in with a general idea of what to look for. I want to be able to buy gaming t-shirts and order band tees and stuff.
     
  2. Mihael

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    4-10 is a wide spread of sizes! I wear 4-6 and it's men's S or M depending on the piece of clothing, but I'm tall too, so I dunno.

    Also keep in mind that men's clothes are meant to be way baggier than women's clothes. You could try a compressive sports bra as well.
     
    #2 Mihael, Aug 28, 2017
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2017
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  3. AlexJames

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    Yeah. Well at the store, they are labelled as two sizes...4/6 is my normal and depending on what i'm looking at, 8/10 can work if they're out of 4/6. Like all my nightgowns are 8/10 and its a little big on me but i don't mind cause they're meant to be.

    Huh. I"ve read that compressive sports bras would be an option...well some type of bra...any brand names you know of? I mean we've got a fitness clothing section at the store so that's an option as well as the regular womens bra/undies/socks section. Is that what you mean, are they from the fitness section or something? Idk bras lol and i'm a girl. I just buy the same brand/variety that's always worked for me and that's it. I don't branch out.

    Is it okay to try on bras at the store or is that weird? I hate buying bras, trying them on at home, and realizing they don't fit cause then its too embarrasing to return them to the store cause my coworkers work at the service desk.

    BTW, how did you add "Michael, he/him" on there? Cause i want to add my preferred name, Alex, but all the different editing options is confusing. What specific label on that editing page do i type in to get that?
     
    #3 AlexJames, Aug 28, 2017
    Last edited: Aug 28, 2017
  4. Mihael

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    The sports bras. They cost as much as binders(?), but : Adidas, Nike, Underworks, but I would try at any sports store or... I found one in Top Shop too. And in a shop with underwear simply.

    Ueah you can try them on in the store, sure, in the fitting rooms.
     
  5. Crisalide

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    "Edit signature"?
     
  6. BrookeVL

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    Target sells good quality and cheap sports bras, C9 by Champion generally has good quality stuff.

    You'll have to try on the shirts, but I'd imagine you'd need a small since you're so short.
     
  7. AlexJames

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    Thanks Michael! Now i have a good place to start.
     
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  8. AlexJames

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    Thanks Brooke! Now I've got another good place to start. Lol yes i did have to get a small, i got two shirts in Mens S 34/36 is what the tags say. I didn't expect to feel so ecstatic and happy looking in the mirror in the fitting room seeing how well it fit me either. Not gonna lie that confused me a bit.
     
  9. BrookeVL

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    No problem, glad to help!!! And yeah, I love Target, so shop there not Wal-Mart. lol
     
  10. AlexJames

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    Bumping this b/c i have another question now. Ever since i saw myself in the mirror in the fitting room in a perfectly fitting men's t-shirt, i just can't get it out of my head. I want to shop for and even buy men's deodorant, body spray, summer PJ type clothes, etc. But i don't want to just get rid of my girl's stuff either, at least i don't think. I don't think i'm trans but this is confusing cause its so sudden and so strong. I think this whole time i've been trying to convince myself that having my preferred name was enough but i don't think it is. I desire a haircut and a shopping trip but its confusing cause idk what this means. Am i bigender, or genderfluid, hell am i trans? I don't think i'm trans. But at the same time i've accidentally been called a boy on another forum once before years and years ago and i didn't really feel the need to correct them either. I haven't had the opportunity to test pronouns so idk. I just don't know. And jumping into it without knowing sounds scary but perhaps i need to jump right in and feel it out, feel out what fits. Anyone wanna help?

    Edit to clarify - what's bothered me for ages - and the only feeling i am clear about - is that being called just a girl and by my birth name feels wrong and restricting. To the point that with my name i want to correct them but stop myself cause being out at work isn't an option...cause idk what to be out as plus my mom's friends shop there. Can't have the homophobic transphobic religious mother find out through a friend while i can't financially afford to move out.

    Oh and status update, mom has yet to remark on my men's department t-shirt. I'm so happy! Now if only the talk w/ my sister and eventually my mom about cutting my hair will go so well...it'll still be a girl's cut, but for me whose had long hair her whole life and never had the motivation to change it...shoulder length is big for me. I'm only confident enough to make it shoulder length.
     
    #10 AlexJames, Aug 29, 2017
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2017
  11. Mihael

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    With the identity. I'd say the best thing there is to just follow your gut. How do you feel about identifying for example as an androgyne, like you inserted on the left? Does it feel right to you, or uncomfortable for some reason? What would you say that you identify with in gender the most. Oh. I know. Describe your gender. As simple as that. In any words you want, whatever you feel describes you best.

    I also cut my hair shoulder length at first, no problem xD But it feels a lot less girly. Really. I never went shorter than chin length.

    Clothes can be very rewarding and it can feel very cool to dress more like yourself.
     
  12. Matto_Corvo

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    I honestly still haven't figured out how to convert women's into men's sizes

    (warning, following content will let you know how fat I am)
    So I'm 5'9ish and around 255lbs
    In woman's I have no idea what shirt size I wear but in men's the polo shirts I like to wear are around a large 2x to a 3x. Women's pants (last I wore some) is around a 26, in men's I wear about a 44 I believe.

    Honestly I found the best way to figure it out is to go and try on different shirts and pants. And just because you were a 2x in that brand does not mean the other brand will be the same.
     
  13. Crisalide

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    I don't know how to help, but you're not alone. I felt the same last summer, after the most feminine two years of my life (lipstick! boyfriend! little HEELS!).
    It was so sudden that I changed gender expression to masculine in order to make the feminine side feel ashamed and change my mind xD. After every step, I felt a bit ashamed and "gone too far", but soon I wanted more and rejected the femininity left. In the while, I questioned my gender and found out that no, it's not a phase.
    The same every time I change gender settings on EC xD
     
  14. AlexJames

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    No, andro doesn't fit. But at the time it was a short list and i didn't see anything else i really liked. Like, in my head i see gender as a personal thing that tbh i find hard to describe. Characteristics come to mind first. I've never really related to girls. I don't get makeup or coordinating outfits or shoes or what have you. T-shirt and jeans with tennis shoes has always been my style. I like gaming and anime. If i had the stamina for it, going out and doing shit like biking or hiking - non sport physical things - would be fun. I can be too serious and i don't get humor. But characteristics isn't gender. You can be as tomboy as they come and still be a girl. That's gender roles, stereotypes, and i hate stereotypes.

    So what differentiates it? On one hand, maybe if i could be free to shop whatever department i wanted and do whatever i wanted with my hair, same for a binder, that would be cool. But i don't know that i'm genderfluid...the occasions on which i feel like being girly are very few and far between and are usually too short lived to actually be carried out. I say that i'm both (bigender) but then i have to ask myself, what makes me a girl? A boy? Is it a feeling or is it my interpretation of my presentation of gender roles/stereotypes?

    The draw to boy everything is scary because i've never had body dysphoria and still don't. Well, i say that but the desire to see myself in a binder just keeps creeping up no matter how far i bury it. I don't think anything i've thought is abnormal. I mean isn't it normal to want to be a boy for just a day to see what its like or to think it would be cool if you could switch sex organs for a day and try it.

    Random addition but in video games, i pick the boy or girl avatar fairly evenly with a bit of a lean towards the boy one. Especially if you can customize the character's clothes/hair/etc. But i still willingly chose girl avatars and have bought, for example, both Pokemon sun and moon so i can choose a boy for one and a girl for the other and use all the customization options.
     
    #14 AlexJames, Aug 29, 2017
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2017
  15. AlexJames

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    Yeah, i've unfortunately figured out the brand sizing thing lately. Its a pain. Why can't it all be standardized. Shopping for clothes for work would be so much easier that way, i mean its hard enough that i'm abnormally short. Idk how to convert them either...i either go on google or on here and hope for the best. I try to aim for as few visits to the fitting rooms before buying something as possible.
     
  16. Alexis17

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    Hey there!
    I don't know how useful my reply will be to your clothing situation, but I am also fairly short and slim and I usually have to go to the kids section to find something in my size. Usually something that fits an average sized 11-12 year old boy fits me. I hope this is somewhat helpful to you in the future.
    Good luck with everything! :slight_smile:
     
  17. FoxEars

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    I am a very similar size and I don't fit into men's clothing at all. Perhaps an XXS but I've never seen something that size, lol.
    I shop in the boy's section, looking at ages 12-13 or 13-14. Smaller depending on the design.
    I suggest trying things on before you buy them
     
  18. Mihael

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    So you like boyish things more? Do you relate to guys or not really either?
     
  19. Kodo

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    I'm 5'6 and 130lb. Men's smalls tend to fit me well, but some brands can still be big. Depends on what style you are looking at though. Sometimes I can get away with a medium button down shirt if I tuck it in and throw on some suspenders for a retro look.

    So my suggestion is to try the smallest you can find across the board when it comes to men's clothing.
     
  20. AlexJames

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    Thanks for your replies everyone! I was able to buy two small shirts - Gildan brand, graphic shirts. I made a makeshift binder with a slimming cami by maidenform (I think that's what its called? Idk its shapewear, i bought it for an 'emergency church dress' i never wore). The makeshift binder only reduced chest appearance by 1/3 so not satisfactory but i liked it. Getting a real binder is gonna be problematic. Not even gonna be able to wear it unless its late and everyone's asleep. Gonna branch out into other areas in the meantime so i can feel like a guy enough to explore whatever this is and figure out what i am.