What are you thinking?

Ah. Oh dear.

 

I just found out that my college has an LGBT meet up group thing that starts in September. I debated whether or not I would go. Part of me has a few hesitations though, because:

1. My college is small...It's not a university, It's a community one (I commute and am home every day). So I'd be afraid of outing myself to anyone who might know me. 2. I tend to dislike most LGBT places (I don't count EC, It's decent here). I don't fit in public LGBT places and sometimes get uncomfortable with questions and assumptions. 3. I've mostly considered it to meet new people...possibly for dating. But on the other hand, I'm a mature student and I'm guessing most are around 18-19 years old, which creeps me out in dating.

So....meh. I'll have to think it over, especially since I have almost a month.....

 

Michigan's alternate uniforms for the Florida game are ugly as sin.

 

I'm thinking I'm gonna kill my mouse if the damn thing doesn't start working right.

 

Too much. Like always!

 

I planned on going to the gym but my stomach got the best of me again as i just had a heavy meal

 

I want a cute girlfriend :B

 

Well I was being sarcastic haha.
My Mondays always suck lol.
Coffee always helps though

 

I feel like the only LGBT person in the world who doesn't really care about sex that much without being asexual at the same time. Yeah, it's something I can enjoy and feel interest in, but I also feel that romance is more important in our lives. Other lesbians I know think about how much they want to sleep with girls and talk about her body parts, I think about how much I want to date them, hold them, cuddle them, marry them.

 

I'm a bit of the same way. I like sex and the idea of it to much to be asexual, but at the same time I'm not actively seeking it out or all that worried about getting laid. When I think of being in a relationship I think about all the other stuff; the romance, and fun times, different dates, but sex is something I sometimes forget to factor in.

and as for the LGBT club things you were talking about, I wish I could offer advice by I have none. My experience with LGBT clubs has been limited and not exactly the best. The club I had been attending at my old technical college actually shut down due to students not showing up. One reason being that they held the meetings in the lobby of the busiest building on school, so those who weren't out became to terrified to return. But the main reason was that our faculty adviser/supervisor started going out with one of the 19 year old members and everyone just became uncomfortable after that.
But yours might be different. The least you could do is show up and give it a try.

 

It's annoying when your brain questions something you know that you will never be able to find an answer to, yet at the same time you still want to question it.

 

I might have to get a new laptop
I feel so frustrated.

 

Goal for today...remember my company car does not have a clutch pedal

 

Please let this MRI show that I have a labral tear in my shoulder. It's more serious than the original diagnosis, but it means I can get surgery and finally get this shoulder pain fixed. I don't just want another cortisone injection that doesn't work!

 

Hope all goes well!

 

Back to school time. Sooooooooooooo happy to be out. Can just focus on preparing for classes now and be ready for students.

 

My brother's new favorite show: General Hospital. I wonder if my mother has started wondering if he's gay...

 

Why do I keep sabotaging myself?