This just came up in my feed.. a mom site that posts random blogs. Hold crap I needed this. I literally stopped mid workout and started tearing up. We all deserve true happiness and fulfillment. http://www.scarymommy.com/i-had-leave-my-marriage-be-happy/?utm_source=FB
Reading it I was like.. wow this is spot on. It is a woman's perspective having left her husband for a woman she fell in love with and found happiness. Its another story that was positive with a happy ending for those of us in similar situations discovering ourselves later in life. It resonated with me. Though I realized afterwards that one may say that she jumped straight to the next relationship, and also a new relationship would regardless be more exciting than her marriage (more my insecurities that prevented me from sharing in FB).
Thanks for sharing this. I'm divorced, though not a mom but I got a lot from the article anyway . I certainly get the idea of the puzzle pieces of life not quite fitting. Of always struggling in my mind and heart in a way it seemed others didn't. So I wrote sporadically in my journals about this struggle .., 'why can't I just be happy like everyone else'...being a common theme through the years. Sometimes I look back at my college photo albums (back when we actually put photos in albums!). I sure LOOK happy in these photos, smiling, laughing with my friends, doing all that college stuff. How deceiving photos can be. In reality my college years were often difficult, I often felt lonely, and 'off', I retreated a lot to music on my Sony Walkman (this WAS the 1980's, when the Walkman was the NEW technology!). But, I studied hard and got the exact job I wanted right after graduation. I was still holding together my own 'not quite fitting puzzle.' It all looked good from the outside! UntiI I fell into a deep depression. It has been said that the worst part of depression isn't the sadness, it's the numbness. So true. I developed an eating disorder. I got treatment for both and got better and went on living a 'regular' life. Got married. It wasn't until my mid-40's and I met the woman who changed my world that I experienced true happiness, that the puzzle pieces fit together! And with the puzzle now actually fitting together things got better in general. I felt content and centered and this had a positive effect in all areas of my life. Even WITH a perfectly fit together puzzle it doesn't mean life is easy or without some really tough times or without pain. But being true to myself has certainly made a big difference in the way I face and handle the rough times. The authors words are spot on for sure. For some reason I woke up ridiculously early today. This very real and positive article was a great way to start my day.
You know, I always said my biggest fear was that I would struggle. Not failure, but just hanging on. I wonder if even back then I knew I was just getting by. Not feeling complete. Trying to fill the void. Looking for anything to help me feel something. That article resonated. Thanks for posting
Read the article and it is really spot on. I remember growing up not quite knowing what was wrong. Something was amiss but never put my finger on it. My marriage broke up for totally different reasons and even then it didn't occur to me. The puzzle was still unsolved. Then one day I met someone and suddenly everything changed. The pieces began to fit in and although I did not pursue a relationship with him it did not matter as I was too busy trying to understand what I had been missing all these years. I used to be so depressed for no reason and also had anxiety. Now they have gone or I can handle them a lot better. I am more cheerful and feel better although still single!
@Moonsparkle I'm glad you enjoyed it and that it was so spot on for you too- especially being that you are on the other side. I don't think I realized I have been depressed for years, but it really is more of a numbness. Since discovering all of this lately I am waking up needing much less sleep, feeling alive and alert throughout the day. It's so odd despite the fact that my life is a "mess" currently I am feeling so good. I think I huge part of myself was just turned off and not tapped into. @Polestar thanks for sharing! The puzzle piece analogy really is interesting and makes so much sense. I'm so glad to hear you are so much happier now! @leb10 yep that is exactly how I feel as well. Glad you enjoyed reading it too.
That was very comforting to read, especially during these tumultuous times for me. I so appreciate people who can put these things into words. It's all so hard for me to explain, even to myself. I keep asking myself how I could have missed this and she explains it all so well....
Fantastic article!! Perked me right up I'm so pleased and proud that I'm now completely out but there's a way to go yet. Thanks for sharing this.
