Did you have strict parents growing up?

My mum and dad were pretty mellow and liberal. My dad still behaves like he's 15. He wears my clothes and so there have been times where I have made him remove them in public before.

He also has the habit of asking me about girls and referring to me as "bro". Can anyone sympathize?

 

They seemed more laid back when I was a young kid. Once I got to around 13 they became way more strict about a lot of things. I think they preemptively "geared up" for when I became a rebellious teen but I never did so it was pointless for them to have been like that. Once I turned 18 they totally backed off and now they are more laid back than ever before. They went from my somewhat strict right leaning parents that I grew up with, to the left leaning progressive hippies that they were always meant to be hahah.

 

I really don't know. They didn't seem it, but I think it was mainly because I was so hard on myself and so uptight that they never really got the opportunity.

 

My dad was the more strict and uptight type. Things were usually his way or the highway and you never talked back to him. He seemed to mellow out as I got older. My mom was more or less laid back. As long as I wasn't doing something inappropriate then she was fine.

 

Sounds like my father. He's an eternal teenager, even at age 54.

They weren't very strict, as in I was allowed to do most things I wanted to. However, my mother always wanted to know where I was and who I was with. That has carried on to the present day, actually. haha.

 

If I were to speak my thoughts, I'd be quite disrespecting them. Suffice to say we disagree about a lot, most of which they know nothing of and I prefer to keep that way.

 

My mom was pretty strict with me in comparison to my friends. I had curfews, and there were certain rules she had for me. As bad as I felt about it, I actually snuck around behind my mom's back a lot when I was a teen, and even in my early & mid twenties, just so I could do certain things with friends and get away with doing certain things lol. Now that I'm in my late twenties, she's gotten really laid back and I can get away with basically anything haha...she's like the complete opposite of how she was when I was younger lol. But I mean...I'm an adult with a career, so it's only natural that she's relaxed now.

 

No really. All you had to be was to be honest with on where you were going or if you are going home that night. They pretty much let me do anything I want as long as my grades are good.

 

I wouldn't say "strict" no, but rude, misunderstanding and a tendency to over-worry? Yes. I remember my dad would yell a lot more when I was younger, but to be fair I was making quite terrible emotion-fuelled decisions back then that I deserved to be told off for. Yeah, I was something of a bad kid because I didn't always know how to handle my emotions correctly and it showed.

These days he's a much more mellow guy, often cracking jokes and engaging in interesting conversation. I would say that my mum tends to worry more about me than my dad does, but it's understandable since she's had to go through some rough things and I know she just wants the best. I could pretty much go through what happens at the dinner table word-by-word, usually insults about me being childlike and telling me how I shouldn't be a picky eater anymore. Trust me, I don't like it either, but it physically hurts to eat certain foods for me, it's like practically all my senses are turned up to 100, and some food I can't stand to even look at (thanks to comments from my old friends that still stick with me) or even smell.

They always threaten that if I don't change my behaviour they'll send me to therapy, like that's supposed to concern me even though I've been going to online therapy sessions already without their knowledge.

My mum is rude because she doesn't have much of a filter, and as such tends to be overly-honest with people, which can be awkward when she doesn't like a gift, as she often lets people know and asks for the receipt. She even insulted this limited-edition artwork in front of someone who worked at an art gallery, that was trying to sell it to her, lol. My dad has to apologise for my mum quite a bit, haha. At least she's honest though I guess.

 

My stepmom was super strict.....I had to deal with her throughout all my teenage life until she kicked me out a week after I turned 20. It was definitely not easy...

From what I remember of my birth parents though, they were definitely way more laid back, especially in terms of punishments. But then again, they didn't get a chance to raise me through the teenage years, so who knows? They may have been more strict then lol.

 

My parents are divorced and I spent my childhood between the two; my Dad basically told me to do what I wanted, all I had to do was tell him if I was back for dinner or not and my Mum sometimes wouldn't let me out to remind me of the control she had over me.

 

My mom is pretty laid back but she's Wiccan. As a kid my dad was really cool, he called me 'Daddy's little monster'. He was in the Army and he brought me up to be tougher than any of the boys in the neighborhood. He taught me how to fight, shoot, and field strip a H&K MP-5 when I was 10. I had a strange childhood. I lost him in Afghanistan in 2010. Yeah, he was pretty laid back too.

 

My dad was always working when i was a kid but when he was home, he was very easygoing and laid back. Quite the joker. My mom fell out of love with him by my teen years though and was constantly feeding me lies and twisted stories to try to get me to side with her and hate him like she did. So because of her doing that, i missed out on having a closer relationship with my dad during my teen years when i really could have used it. My mom was the strict one - it was her way or the highway about literally everything (including opinions), and it was never consistent either. Rules changed depending on what she found convenient or preferable at the time. Growing up with her literally gave me anxiety. She's one of those stereotypical southern, christian, homophobic, transphobic, trump supporting women.

Storytime! Like as a teenager, something as simple as opening the front door when the doorbell rang. I was too short to see through the peephole, so i literally had to just open it. But if it was someone who we did not know like a salesman, she got pissed and talked about how it could have been someone wanting to break in and how could i not think about that with just me and her home. But if it was someone we knew like one of her friends and i did not open the door, i got scolded and told that i was old enough to open the door why did i not open it for said friend. Ever dinnertable conversation became an argument if she had a strong opinion on something. Its like she feels threatened by people not siding with her on things, i really don't get it.

 

I was given a key to the house at the age of 13 and my mom said that she didn't care where I went, who I was with or how long I was out. The only stipulation was that if I came home when everyone was asleep, was to lock the door behind me and to be quiet. Granted, this was in south central Wisconsin in 1998, but still. I had a lot of freedom growing up.

 

They both had very firm boundaries and I was in no doubt that there would be serious repercussions if I crossed the line. I'd say my father was the stricter of the two, in fact, he could be needlessly overbearing at times.

 

Not really, I just kind of did what I was told so my mom gave me more of her trust. She wouldn't care much if I went to hang out with friends but she wanted me to get semi-good grades at the very least and I had a curfew until I graduated High School but I was always strict myself on my grades (I don't like getting anything below a B) and I never really thought about going out on my own at night until I got to college. She didn't let me have a phone until high school but that was less about her worrying what I would do with the phone and more just thinking I would lose it somewhere. After getting in college though, she became even more laxed about things and now she more or less just lets me do my own thing.

 

I'm gonna elaborate more. I never really had a father figure growing up, even though there was a male (my step-father) person physically present. I was raised by my mom and grandmother. I never really had any restrictions or oversight that I can remember growing up. Just basic stuff like come home when it gets dark, or in an hour, or when I'm called back. I guess it was mostly because I was a super responsible kid and we lived in some very small towns then. I actually had to ask to get grounded (and then found ways to get around/out of being grounded lol).

I still remember when the above quote happened. A couple months before I actually got the key, I had asked for one, not expecting to actually get it. From that point, until I graduated high school, I was independent in every way a kid could be short of actually having to provide for themselves. I could've wound up anywhere I wanted, and I actually got the crazy idea after 9/11 to hitchhike out to New York to help out. The only thing that stopped me wasn't the fear of the unknown, but the fear of getting into trouble with my mom, even tho I believe she probably wouldn't have been mad, just freaked out about where I was

 

Mine weren't that strict but they didn't need to be. I was a pretty good teenager who was harder on myself than they ever would have been on me

 

It was middle ground. We had rules we had to follow and would be punished if we didn't. But it felt fair, parents were understanding and let us answer questions about rules. They were open and honest with us. We were also rewarded and praised for good behavior.

They were laid back in other ways, since I could talk to them about anything, and they liked having fun with us. They were like friends who weren't TOTAL friends since we still could get punished for bad behavior.

I strongly prefer their parenting style over laid back parenting. Being too laid back and friendly is bad for a kid's mental health, they aren't taught right from wrong, and can grow up into narcissistic adults with no respect for boundaries. I also dislike overly strict parents who control their kids. That's also bad for children's mental health as it causes self-esteem issues and fear of authority. A middle ground is the healthiest, and I'm grateful my parents were that way.