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I don't enjoy Pride. Do you?

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Sonata, Jul 22, 2017.

  1. Sonata

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    It is the season of holding pride weeks all over Europe. I have been to several pride parades in different countries during the past years but l have never found them that interesting. It is fun and entertaining, but nothing more. Isn't it supposed to serve a higher purpose? It must have been about liberation and raising awareness some time ago. But why is it so much about nudity and eccentricity these days? Am l the only one who does not feel comfortable and at home when taking part in the parade? Is something wrong with me that l cannot be both homosexual and eccentric? Is it my age, or am l being too conservative? Do we have a thing like a conservative queer? Maybe l am inclined to be that type.
     
  2. Creativemind

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    I'm a conservative gay person too (not really in a political sense, but in a modest sense).

    Sometimes I feel like I don't fit in our community as a whole because we are stereotyped as only being one specific way. I never liked pride personally....
     
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  3. Really

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    I think it depends on the event, perhaps. I just went to the Pride run/walk event here today. And while there are some crazy outfits amongst the participants, there are way more people in everyday running/walking gear. I've also been to the festival at the beach where the parade ends and as it's during the day, it's marketed as family friendly. I've never noticed too many kids. :wink: Also, you can't drink in outdoor public spaces here so there's no alcohol, so that might help with the "tone". If you'd still like to go, maybe research the individual events within the Pride celebrations more closely to find a better match for your personality. These two low-key events are about as much excitement as I can take. :wink:
     
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  4. JaimeGaye

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    IMHO when a group starts burning effigies of the President of these United States whomever that may be, Claiming they want the world to be green then completely trashing the locale of the event and taking on a myriad of political themes these events stop celebrating our being different and start aligning gay people with whatever is the popular political movement or cutting edge "In" thing of the moment.
    When "Gay Allies" show up in their all black battle gear spoiling for a fight with anyone they can manage to piss off and this is tolerated by the promoters it is no longer Pride and should instead be called SAD.
     
    #4 JaimeGaye, Jul 22, 2017
    Last edited: Jul 22, 2017
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  5. Koizee

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    My problem with Pride is that it makes a lot of people feel left out just because they are straight or cis. Why should someone be left out just because they are born a certain way? That's just repeatin' history right there.
    Also in more Liberal areas, Pride is making gays and trans people well... too prideful :/

    However Pride is generally inoccent and well-founded and doesnt tend to bug me to much
     
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  6. Humbly Me

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    It probably depends a lot on who organized the 'pride' and where you are located. Some American festivals in certain places are very out there, whether they are labeled as pride or not. Personally, from the videos I have seen of 'pride' events, those I have heard of seem ehh but a couple looked pretty cool. I definitely don't mind go-go guys and people in revealing clothing but I am 16 so probably not surprising ;P
     
  7. Paxana

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    I thought the whole point was because Pride represents overcoming the obstacles and awful history of oppression and discrimination that comes with being LGBTQ+. Cis/straight ppl should be kind of thankful they don't have one
     
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  8. silverhalo

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    No one event is ever going to suit everybody's idea of fun and I can't speak for prides other than in the uk but over here certainly at the bigger ones it is a collection of events over about a week, usually culminating in the parade and a party type event so if the main event is not for you maybe one the earlier quieter ones maybe.
    I have been to prides over here with straight friends and they didn't feel left out, it was just about acceptance and everyone being who they want to be and sure there are some really eccentric out there people but there are also thousands of average people and for some pride can be a safe place, a bit like EC where they can be themselves and not feel threatened.
     
  9. justaguyinsf

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    Going to Pride parades is fun one or two times, but it gets old pretty quick. I also agree that the tendency toward exhibitionism and eccentricity is dumb. I also think they have a racist element to them as they skew very heavily toward white people (I'm white) and I would bet a lot of people of color don't fell particularly welcome at them. I was pondering how odd the phenomenon of Pride parades is this year (as I was trying to find a way to get around ours) in that far more important historical events worthy of parades (I was thinking of the Emancipation Declaration freeing the US slaves) are completely ignored. I guess a lot of people love having permission to drink in the middle of the day.
     
  10. looking for me

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    i think it depends on the Pride, and the group you're in. i usually hang with youth orientated groups so it's pretty tame. im older so somethings can be a bit of a surprise, but i figure to each his/her/their own, and i just do my thing. for instance, there was some nudity, up to the legal limit, and some political chants etc. and i came in a skirt, wig and make up as myself for the first time. with out Pride i dont think i could have done that. so i'll take the odd, the eccentric, and the silly, it is a truly fun and empowering for me.
     
  11. OGS

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    I've always enjoyed Pride. On the other hand I've also always felt pretty engaged and involved in the community. I've been to well over twenty such events and I can't say I've ever been to the one people always describe on here. I'd kind of like to go to it for a change. Our parade is fun but hardly scandalous. About a million people come, many of them straight, many of them children. It's about four hours long and, to be honest, after all the politicians, church groups and employee groups (gay cops, gay teachers, gay bankers oh my!) I really kind of wish there were a few more drag queens and gogo boys! Still I've always found it very moving. For one day in June the people of Chicago come together with our elected representatives, our employers, the businesses we frequent, our sports teams and choirs and clubs and we literally take to the streets to celebrate the ability to love as you choose. I think that's awesome. And, no, the topless woman I saw at this year's parade (the only nudity I saw--I know pasties make it legally not nudity but it still seems like nudity to me) didn't somehow negate that for me...

    I understand a parade isn't for everyone and that's why here in Chicago there's a month of parties, rallies, talks, concerts, dances and a two day street fair. If a parade isn't someone's thing hopefully they would enjoy one of the other events.
     
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  12. DementedTrendz

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    I do not enjoy pride at all, I find it cringy
     
  13. HM03

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    My opinion probably doesn't count because never actually been to one. Probably because I feel uncomfortable in large crowds and tend to gravitate to more simple events.
     
    #13 HM03, Jul 23, 2017
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2017
  14. looking for me

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    you opinion does count. have you gone to smaller Pride related events? this year we had a BBQ and pool party, meet and greets, picnics, bowling evening of course our bonfire that predates Pride here in Newfoundland. this year i went to as many as i could including our parade and festival.
     
  15. Rvnt

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    I have not been in awhile, but one of my defining moments in life was walking down the street with my partner, with a mass of people, after the parade, gay affirmative music blasting, and I thought, wow, all these people are gay, lesbian, whatever, in my city, and I just felt such an immense sense of belonging. I am feeling so awesome just writing this.

    That was back early 2000's. About 5 years ago, I was on a float at the LA Gay Pride parade playing music, and it was so awesome, doing something that is my passion, and just being there, even though I had partially gone back into the closet. Now that I am mostly out again, it just makes me feel so good that I had these experiences.

    But, I did not go to Pride this year. Massive crowds, and not the right timing this year. My community is having a big gay after event next month, and I am planning on going to that.
     
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  16. Koizee

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    Normally I'd agree, but the thing about pride is that it isn't where it needs to be. Parades themselves are usually held in more liberal areas as that's the most safe option for pride parades, but because of this it isn't helping LGBTQ+ kids who actually need pride and help and support, but are to stuck in their area to do anything about it. Pride Parades instead mostly attract kids who were taught that being gay is something unique, something to of course take pride in, some of 'em become a little selfish and attention-seeking, these types of kids have never been discriminated against and because of the whole "gay pride" mindset they can even become heterophobic.
    I agree that Pride represents the overcoming of obstacles that LGBTQ+ people had to go through, but half of those people (especially the younger generations) who take part in pride have not been discriminated against to the level that others have.

    And I admit, I became a little prideful too after my first parade (Which was really cool, so cool it made me feel bad for people who felt left out)
     
    #16 Koizee, Jul 23, 2017
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2017
  17. DirectionNorth

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    I agree completely! Just like I found it awful when all the men were in an uproar about the female-only screenings of Wonder Woman. No one bats an eye when there are men-only events, but when women want something of their own, heaven forbid that. I don't see any problem with any group or community wanting some events to celebrate and support themselves.
     
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  18. wickedwitch

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    I've never yet attended a pride parade, in part because when I first came out in the rather redneck-y part of the world that I am from, being visibly out felt physically dangerous and I didn't wish to draw attention to myself. Now that I live in a different place and many years have passed I really just don't like crowds. In my current city fully one third of the population turns out for this (100,000) and that's just too much for me. I have gone to small events like potlucks and workshops in both cities and enjoyed them very much.

    Re: nudity in the parade. I used to wonder about this too, why people would do this (I can't even conceive of getting naked in public) and I didn't have an answer until I read an article where the author explained that in some cities back in the day, the police would raid bathhouses where gay men would gather and they would either arrest these men or throw them out in the street without their clothes as an attempt at shaming them. So marching in the parade naked became a way of thumbing one's nose (or other anatomical parts) at the police and the dominant culture which was insisting that queer people should be ashamed of who they were and what they did. So the men were essentially saying: "You want to see us naked? Here we are and we are not ashamed." Basically they were turning the oppressive tactics of the police upside down.

    It's been a while since I read the article but if I can find it I'll post it.
     
    #18 wickedwitch, Jul 23, 2017
    Last edited: Jul 23, 2017
  19. wickedwitch

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  20. dreamingfreely

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    My daughter and I enjoyed the parade. Not much nudity except for a couple of women with their shirts off and nipples covered. It seemed to be a good mix of ethnic backgrounds as well. I also loved seeing the couples walk around holding hands without a care just like anyone else would be able to do no matter what time of year. It was so mild like someone else said politicians, church groups, employees of so many companies. I actually got excited for the couple far out floats lol. We felt love and acceptance and we're invited to sit with a couple. Also I witnessed compassion as the couple noticed this older lady who was suffering from the heat. They actually gave her their chair. I understand every place is different. I probably wouldn't need to go next year but I might because my friend and her adult daughter are talking about going with me.
     
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