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Should I tell prospective roomates about my sexual orientation?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Jackie C, Jul 20, 2017.

  1. Jackie C

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    Should I tell prospective roomates about my sexual orientation?

    Im moving in less than two weeks, and Ive decided on renting a room until, I get more established and get to know the area better. I wanted to get some opinions, I want to meet with anyone I plan on moving in with to see if they seem cool enough to live with for 6 months or so. Should I tell them that Im gay? They might be homophobic and I wouldnt want to find out later. People are entitled to their own beliefs right or wrong. What do you guys say? Should I say this up front or not?
     
  2. nativeofruby

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    I have two housemates, a guy and a girl. I'm pretty sure none of them know about my sexuality, not that I'm hiding anything, it just never came up. I don't really feel the need to talk to them about it, so... I say do whatever you'd feel comfortable with doing.
     
  3. Humbly Me

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    If you don't think they will have a problem with it, definitely tell them. If it puts you in danger if they find out you are gay, definitely don't.
     
  4. devotions

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    When I was looking for a roommate, there was this questionnaire for everyone to fill out and one of the questions asked if you would be comfortable having a LGBT roommate. There was five choices, one on the far left that was something along the lines of "absolutely not" and then one on the far right that said "no problem with it at all", and then there were choices in between. Quite a few people ticked the option all the way to the left, or the one that leaned only slightly to the left.

    And these were girls. I know that with boys (straight ones) they can be very defensive when it comes to sexuality, even if they are more liberal. That being said I think you should probably disclose that so that you don't get paired with a total asshat. But it is up to you. For me I'm glad that that question was on there, because even though I'm probably not going to be having loads of gay sex (or any kind of sex, for that matter) in my dorm, it just makes me feel more comfortable knowing that my roommate is okay with it.
     
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  5. Jackie C

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    Im just so nervous, Im starting over again in a new town and Im really hoping to come out of the closet here and be myself for the first time. But Im afraid of being rejected, Im moving to a very conservative area. While its stereotyping to say all conservatives are homophobic, because its really only a minority of them that actually care either way, it can still be scary. I'd rather move in with a women they seem to be more excepting, but I dont want to become a Gay BF for a fag hag, I think its so degrading.
     
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  6. JaimeGaye

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    LOL, you don't want to become the room mate of a hyper straight stud who decides you'll make the perfect punching bag either.
    You might try using Craigslist or a Rental Paper and listing yourself as "SGM looking to room short term in platonic setting,,,"
     
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  7. MzMrAlexa

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    You should likely do what your Conscience or better judgement tells you to... Personally if it is short term and you don't plan on having friends over or partners etc. then it likely shouldn't matter. However when you say six months, that is a long time to not be "You" and it would likely be best if you could find someone at least neutral in their views on LGBT as that is a long time to just have a place to sleep but not someplace to call home.
     
  8. ff305

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    I'm in the closet so maybe I'm not the best person to give advice. But I think it's maybe best to get to know that person a little before, I mean if the person is really homophobic he/she might dismiss you right away if you get to know your roomie you can "test the waters" it's generally harder for a person to dissmiss another once they've gotten to know you.