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Would you date bi people?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Heaux, Jul 21, 2017.

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  1. Heaux

    Heaux
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    this will come off as offensive and SORRI. but i'd like to discuss this and see what people think.
    but would you? i'm really anxious when i emotionally get attached to a bi person because for one, they could lean the opposite way more and they're attracted to something you just can't relate with.
    it's not to say i definitely would not ever never date bi people full stop. it's just that if i ever feel emotionally attached, i feel on edge, don't feel like im in the safe zone or something uno.
     
    #1 Heaux, Jul 21, 2017
  2. BadAssBitch

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    I don't really care if they're bisexual to be honest. I'd just be worried in case they would have double the chances of meeting someone else who's better than me and getting with them!
     
    #2 BadAssBitch, Jul 21, 2017
  3. Taraeos

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    Of course! The way I look at it is this- they choose to be in a relationship with YOU at the time. That's the thing to remember.

    Personally I think if someone worries that they'll be left for a guy/girl or whoever, it says more about their insecurity than it does about the other person. I think if someone is attracted to another person, it says that the relationship they're currently in isn't right for either party. The fact that they're bi really has nothing to do with it.
     
    #3 Taraeos, Jul 21, 2017
  4. gravechild

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    I would only date one.
     
    #4 gravechild, Jul 21, 2017
  5. Heaux

    Heaux
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    I feel like when a bi person choose a girl over me, it reminds me of those many straight crushes I had in the past. tragic really. It reminds me that to get your straight crush to like you back, you have to change yourself to a girl at least, which is the impossible. Whereas when a person choose me over another guy, I can then look more into it and see if I lack anything that I can possibly change. basically theres still some hope. but similarly to a straight crush, it makes me feel a little dead inside cos everything's out of my reach.
     
    #5 Heaux, Jul 21, 2017
  6. Chiroptera

    Chiroptera
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    Well, i'm bi, so...

    Think of it this way: When a person (regardless of orientation) is in a relationship, the attraction feeling towards other people won't cease. And, as long as it stays in the realm of fantasies and you aren't cheating your significant other, it is perfectly fine and normal. A straight man will find other women besides his girlfriend attractive, in the street, in school, in work, on television.(and the women will find other men attractive besides her boyfriend). A gay man will also find other men attractive besides his boyfriend. Same thing with a lesbian couple. And a bi person will find other persons attractive, besides his/her partner.

    Again, that is completely normal, as long as you are honest to the other person (and the "contract" of the relationship, monogamy, poligamy, etc.) and cheating isn't happening.

    A relationship is much more than sex. If sex was the only thing that could bind us to other people in a romantic bond, then relationships would be quite pointless. However, when you love a person, you like him/her because of many reasons, included but not limited to sex. Therefore, when you are in a healthy relationship with a bisexual person, for example, there is more going on than just the sexual attraction.

    Of course, unfortunately, there are bi people who cheat on their partners. Just like the straight people. And lesbians. And gays. But there are faithful people in all orientations too.

    Finally, as a personal example, i'm a bisexual man who prefers to be in monogamous relationships, and i'm happy this way. I have dated both men and women, and during the time of the respective relationships, i was happy and satisfied with it. If i am with a man, i will fantasize with women. If i am with a woman, i will fantasize with men. But fantasies are normal, as long as they stay in the realm of fantasy. And i'm not unhappy because i don't have "both things at the same time". I don't need to date everyone in the planet i find attractive to be a happy person.
     
    #6 Chiroptera, Jul 21, 2017
  7. JonSomebody

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    I have dated bi people in my life. However, I have never been in an committed relationship with a bi person.
     
    #7 JonSomebody, Jul 21, 2017
  8. Creativemind

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    There are so many heteromantic bisexual women in my area (that DON'T say what they really are) to the point I've become a bit more cautious. There are bi people out there that I date, but I prefer them to have a stronger leaning toward the same sex.

    The thought of being left for a man is worse than being left for a woman to me, but I also have to worry about lesbians who have internalized homophobia in this regard. So in reality...there's no difference (I was left for a man by a lesbian who couldn't accept it, so whatever to that one). As long as someone is monogamous and can stay in a closed relationship for the remainder of their life (as I want a permanent relationship, possibly marriage), sexuality is no issue. And lesbians are no different in this regard, as many of them may not want a permanent closed relationship, and some bi people might.
     
    #8 Creativemind, Jul 21, 2017
  9. Lexa

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    Yes of course.

    I'm bi and I had a huge crush on a bi boy in my teens. And I mean a huge crush.

    So yes, I definitely would date bi people.
     
    #9 Lexa, Jul 21, 2017
  10. nativeofruby

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    Fine by me as a fellow bisexual... Actually, a couple years back I was seeing a girl who was also bi and she shortly entered a relationship with a guy. Obviously, it sucked for me but it's not about one's sexuality - gays, lesbians and even straight people are just as likely to ditch someone as bis, if that makes any sense.
    Honestly, I've had girls reject the idea of even trying to date me when they find out I'm bi and call it a "phase" or that I would end up cheating on them with a guy... It's just hurtful.
     
    #10 nativeofruby, Jul 21, 2017
  11. Daydreamer1

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    It would be hypocritical if I wouldnt
     
    #11 Daydreamer1, Jul 21, 2017
  12. BothWaysSecret

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    I agree with this completely! I also prefer monogamous relationships and just because I like both doesn't mean I'm going to leave someone for another person. I hate the whole "I'm bi so I'm a whore" stereotype. Like you said, anybody of any orientation can cheat on their partner, not just bi people.
     
    #12 BothWaysSecret, Jul 21, 2017
  13. PlantSoul

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    #13 PlantSoul, Jul 21, 2017
  14. PlantSoul

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    Yes. I've got nothing against them. In fact, I may even be one.
     
    #14 PlantSoul, Jul 21, 2017
  15. RiverSong

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    Being that I am probably bisexual myself, yes, I would.
     
    #15 RiverSong, Jul 21, 2017
  16. Shoei Loei

    Shoei Loei Guest

    Dating a bisexual woman would be fine with me, honestly. I would date any woman (bi, pan, lesbian, or whatever else) as long as she loved me and was faithful to me...of course I would be loving and faithful of her also.
     
    #16 Shoei Loei, Jul 21, 2017
  17. Kodo

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    Hell yes. Then we could talk about all the beautiful men and women and it would be totally cool.
     
    #17 Kodo, Jul 21, 2017
  18. Blast

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    Yes. My partner of 5+ years is bisexual.
     
    #18 Blast, Jul 21, 2017
  19. Spot

    Spot
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    Yes.
     
    #19 Spot, Jul 22, 2017
    Last edited: Jul 22, 2017
  20. looking for me

    looking for me
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    considering i am BI, of course
     
    #20 looking for me, Jul 22, 2017
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