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I hate "Myself" so much

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by RoseChan00, Jun 26, 2017.

  1. RoseChan00

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    I really hate just so few things about me... but i hate them so much that i hate evrrything else about myself.
    I can,in one instance, feel depressed and awful, and then go over and try to give advice to a friend and be all hapog and cheery, while also sounding depressed and FEELING depressed while talking to the friend helping with my lroblems.
    its like... just cinstant masks. I hate them. I hate them. I HATE THEM

    Granted that may be normal but to me i don't think it is... to jsut have you emotions capable of shifting so quickly just to be able to fit what's going on around you.
    I just... i dont like it.

    then i always have feings kf doubt. at everything. at everyone. And i hate that because it mames me feel like im just being litiful. It makes me feel vulnerable... it makes me feel like i amount to nothing.
    And i hate it.

    There is so kuch more i could say here but i really want to get away from these feelings for a moment. I wanted to vent them out and just... get them off my chest. (... I wish i hadn't said that)
     
  2. Clinker

    Clinker Guest

    I myself go through things like this on a regular basis, and agree that it is something to be despised.
    Though whats good is that you recognise these feelings and what to be rid of them.
    Do you have a way of stoping these feeling quickly when the occur?
     
  3. RoseChan00

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    These periods of self hatred and doubt?how i get away fro. them?

    I cant. Unless i make progrezs on something. But right now i have nothing to rely work for. I have to feel like im doing seomthing to help mhself or others... but on hers i cant ever offer go advice without feeling like i sakd something wrong. Its just a terrible cycle...
     
  4. AlwaysPLUR

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    I'm so sorry you're having these feelings, doll. I know how these mental illnesses can really eat at you from deep down, but (and I know it doesn't help much now) it WILL get better, and you'll be even stronger for it!
    I do this thing where I get to know someone and I'll decide if they're a "real person" or not. Later on I noticed all I was doing was noticing depression/bipolar/etc in people and seeing myself in them (a little narcissistic perhaps), but I think I stand by my labeling system.
    I can tell that you are a REAL person. Someone with depth, and demons to battle, and with the strength to fight it.
    I am so, so certain you'll be able to take these feelings and turn it into something amazing and beautiful.
    I believe in you! <3
     
  5. RoseChan00

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    Yeah. but i was actually having a mild panic there. Things are calmer now... but i still need confirmation on one of my other threads about HRT...
     
  6. Clinker

    Clinker Guest

    if you'd like some venting/prevention methods i could give you my preferred ways of ridding these terrible feeling when i get them. I usually just sketch out a picture of something i like to take my mind off things, was told by an old teacher creativity soothes the mind. Or think of a happier time when I couldn't contain my excitement. Soft music also helps. Just some tips, Hope the panic spell is over soon :slight_smile:
     
    #6 Clinker, Jun 26, 2017
    Last edited by a moderator: Jun 26, 2017
  7. AlwaysPLUR

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    I'm sorry to say I don't know anything about HRT :frowning2:
    I haven't considered it enough to look into it. Sometimes I wish I would do it (and if I had considered it when I was your age I feel like I definitely would have done it!) but I'm becoming more okay with myself in this body. I've been thinking of myself more as genderfluid, and I think... hopefully... this will be best for me... maybe.
    I do wish you the best of luck though, and don't you hesitate for one second to message me if you need some words of encouragement or anything at all. We're in this together, love
     
  8. RoseChan00

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    alot of those things are difficult or impossihle for me.
    However, i was able to help someone, so im feeling better,but i still have some lingering feelings... but that's usual. just waiting for something right now.