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Confused, but wanting to share

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by AlwaysPLUR, Jun 25, 2017.

  1. AlwaysPLUR

    Regular Member

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    Location:
    Knoxville
    Gender:
    Androgyne
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Hi everyone,
    As I'm learning more about myself and letting myself explore what I've tried to suppress, I've been having conflicting thoughts.
    I don't know if I'm gay, straight, transgender, or what and it's kind of driving me a little crazy.
    Some days I'm okay with thinking "labels don't matter," but other times I think a label would make it easier for me.

    A little about me:
    I love dressing up in feminine clothes, costumes, dresses, makeup, etc. I recently shaved my legs for the pride parade in DC and I've been keeping up with them because I like the way it feels. I live with my father right now, so I have to dress very secretly and only at night.
    However, I also love "bro'ing down with my boys."
    I've been toying with this new term I learned, Androgynous, but I don't know if that's right either.

    I don't know, and I don't know how to know. It's frustrating. And I really want to share with someone in my life, but I don't know how to go about that!
    If someone here has any advice or experience, I'd love to hear it.
    Thanks so much for your time.

    (Also, prepare yourselves for more posts looking for advice in other departments, because I am going to keep pushing myself to be more "fem")
     

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  2. anthracite

    anthracite Guest

    I think femming up and experimenting with that is the best thing you can do to help you in questioning, I did that just the other way round.

    If you need anything about style, there is a trans girl thread (you gotta dig a bit) or the Do-I-pass-thread to help you.
     
  3. AlwaysPLUR

    Regular Member

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    Bisexual
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    Thanks so much, I'll certainly try to find those!
     
  4. Nike007

    Full Member

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    Trying out different things is also a good idea. You can also look up and do research on different terms if you want that. I feel that you look quite feminine to me, and I wouldn't have known you were AMAB without looking harder, so I'd say you would pass. You can also try different pronouns and a nickname or new name if you feel like that would help. Good luck on your journey.

    -Niko
     
  5. Foxfeather

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Sexual Orientation:
    Straight
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    Congratulations, your gender is: fabulous.
     
    Brian Denver and AlwaysPLUR like this.
  6. i am just me

    Regular Member

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    If you want to share your thoughts with someone, this forum is a great place to start. For people in real life, if there is someone you know who is supportive and who you trust fully, start with them. If you're not sure, try including some transgender topics in conversation and see how they react.

    As others have said, experimenting is really helpful. You could also try writing down your thoughts and feelings. That's what helped me a lot.

    Above all, try to not focus only on your gender identity. I know it's hard not to stress out about it, I've been in the same place. But if you feel that things get overwhelming, do things you like and that make you happy. It can actually help you to figure things out, if you get your mind off them for a while.

    I wish you all the best with figuring things out!
     
  7. AlwaysPLUR

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Thank you all for your words of encouragement, I really appreciate it! I'm going to try not to worry about it so much for now, but there is this local support group that meets next weekend, so I'm looking forward to meeting other people. It'd be cool to meet someone maybe in the same boat as myself, too!
    FoxFeather, thanks so much for that, I love it <3
    I Am Just Me, I really love your signature "The only label I need is human."
    Nike, I really appreciate you saying that, I worry about not looking passable and just looking silly, that made my day!
     
    Brian Denver likes this.
  8. maverick1

    Regular Member

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    Hi

    I'm 58 and always longed to dress like a girl. I just came out to my wife. Not sure where we are heading but she lets me dress at home. And I know what you feel about shaved legs, it does feel fabulous!