silverhalo,such a relief to know I'm not alone. Sometimes it's overwhelming and I think ahead too much and start worrying how will I meet someone and if I do what about the physical side of things etc etc. As my friend said just focus on the present. I need to get used to it myself first and everything else will fall into place in time. And he always gives good advice and has been out a long time so I reckon he knows what he's talking about. But definitely my imagination can be a problem at times!!!!! I love the Mark Twain quote: "I've had a lot of worries in my life,most of which never happened".
OMG, I can so relate to jumping 15 steps ahead in my mind. It's a curse to live your life like that. Working on that in therapy big time. Just like with hetero relationships, the idea is that when you meet someone you "click" with, the physical part of intimacy just falls into place. Instinct takes over. You can't plan it.
I'm really working on it too with someone I go to but it's tough. I'm cursed with a vivid imagination. It was great for writing exciting,imaginative English essays at school but it's only trouble with regard to everyday life!!!!! I keep telling myself that too re the physical side of things!!!!
I've got the vivid imagination too. I'm a musician, so it makes sense. I'm pretty intense. It's very NOT GOOD when mixed with anxiety and major changes of lifestyle, haha.
Im on my phone so can't really write long posts but I had all your worries and trying to think 15 steps ahead. I thought why come out I'm never going to find a girlfriend anyway. But all I can say is I have a girlfriend and none of my worries came through. It's even better than you imagine.
Hey neighbour!!! Welcome to EC! Not only are we on the same Island but we are in the same boat! lol. There was a moment in the Autumn of 2016 when I was like "Oh my God! I'm gay! I am SO gay!". It was like suddenly out of no-where everything fell into place. It was a strange time because I felt such a sense of relief and freedom, but also completely overwhelmed by all this would mean, including many of the aspects that you have mentioned. As the months have passed though my mind is definitely starting to adapt, and I have learned not to rush myself. At the start I felt the need to figure everything out straight away, now I am enjoying doing it at a more realistic pace. It is a lot to get your head around.
Hi Laughsalot. Thanks so much for your message. Not rushing and taking it day by day seems to be key. So at least we know there are 2 of us in Ireland now
Hi and welcome. When i first came here, someone recommended going to the mirror and saying 'i am gay' I wasn't prepared for the incredible (positive) emotional impact it had. You may want to give it a try!
