When I was little, I wasn't very masculine until I was in 3rd grade. I liked dresses, dolls and all my friends were girls. I was very feminine. Now, I identify as a trans boy and have dysphoria and such. But I only started having these feelings maybe about a year ago. Does this mean anything? My mom uses it against me as a "you aren't trans" argument.
I don't think that means anything. Hell, you could be a CIS guy that was feminine as a child. Take my brother for example. He loved the color pink, dollhouses, and cooking sets. Yet he grew up to be a very masculine acting teenager....so yeah, he was a cis guy that had feminine tastes as a child. Probably because he had older sisters. lol Don't see why it should be different with trans people.
Ok, thanks. I was questioning if I was lying to myself, stuff like that. At least I know it didn't mean anything. :icon_bigg
I'm not sure how old you are but age could be a factor. I've heard that, since there is much less of a difference between the sexes during childhood, it is rather common for trans people not to notice or experience gender dysphoria until puberty. Denial, socialization, and all kinds of other factors could also explain why you did not identify as trans when you were younger. There is not a lot of validity to your mom's argument. Creativemind makes a good point in that childhood gender expression can change. And of course there is a difference between gender expression and gender identity. There are many hyper-feminine cis men who are perfectly content with their gender, as well as feminine afab people who still experience gender dysphoria (like myself).
Yeah, that makes sense. I didn't start feeling dysphoric until maybe halfway through puberty (I hope). And I agree, my mom does not have a really valid argument... it just kinda stuns me for a bit and then we argue again. Thanks! This makes everything a lot clearer. :icon_bigg
I think that it can depend on age factors. Like, you really can ignore things until you are older and you realize what is not making you happy. There are people that did not realize that they were transgender until they were way older. So, if she brings that up, you could always say that others that are way older have transitioned.
I was what you would consider a fairly masculine man, but I still experienced dysphoria. Hyper-one way gender expression CAN be a form of denial. And I'm one of those who didn't realize she was trans until her late 20's. It happens a lot, and I've heard of plenty of people not realizing until they were way older than me. I'm also pretty sure I was just your average, garden variety boy up until puberty, which is when the dysphoria started. Kids do tend to not realize there's a difference between boys and girls until they're older.
I think that's part of human nature. I'm struggling with a similar situation-same age as you, everytime I bring up the fact of how I like girls to my mom, she assumes I'm confused because I'm 13. And I thought I liked guys, only coming to the realization that those feelings weren't what I was comfortable with. Do you remember, before third grade, feeling comfortable with feminine qualities?
Before I say anything relevant, you are a very articulate 13 y.o. poltergirl. On to the topic at hand, I completely understand where you're coming from, KartoffelWal. And yes, I believe Brooke's statements are completely accurate. In my case, I wasn't so much hypermasculinizing myself as I was fervently rejecting anything feminine, but her point still stands.
